11. Describe 10 pet peeves you have.
- Pronouncing the "t" in the word "often". I know the dictionary lists both pronunciations as acceptable, but in my book, the "t" is silent, as in 'listen'
- Absolute language, as in "You always do xxxxx..." or "I never get to...." Using these extremes is a linguistic way that we either set our arguments in an unassailable position or invite people to defy our interpretation, sparking conflict. The only acceptable use of them in our household is, "God always loves you, and he will never stop loving you!"
- Drive-thrus. I avoid using the drive through whenever possible. Exception: Sonic, as it is a drive-up and not a drive through. Although for those Sonic franchises that have a drive through, I still use the drive up stalls.
- Justifying poor adult behavior that affects kids by saying, "Kids are resilient..." It is true, they are, but that is not an excuse.
- Political correctness
- Butchering joke delivery
- Poor theater etiquette
- Bullies
- Running out of battery power on various devices (iPhone, camera flash, etc)
- Cashiers who can't count back change
- Wake up, turn of alarm
- Get the rest of the household up and harangue them until they are moving.
- Get kids to school, self to work
- See clients/do paperwork/marketing/billing
- Pick kids up from school
- Depending of the day of the week, I either have more clients in the evening, or I am working at the hospital as a chaplain or there is some family activity (boy scouts, ballet, chorus, school event)
- Evening routine, homework, dinner, family time, bedtime
- Once everyone else is in bed, I usually stay up for a few hours and blog, watch TV or work on a project.
- Procrastination. I am unfortunately very good, as I have spent years perfecting my technique in avoiding doing stuff I know I should do promptly
- Gluttony. Despite being a 'deadly sin', I find myself having to exercise self control so I don't give in to my mouth's desire to enjoy a flavor, taste or texture of a delicious food item.
- Technology. I am a technophile, but because I am not affluent, I will never get to be a first adopter...
- Punctuality. I often run on "Emery Time", which is to say at least 5 minutes later than anything is scheduled to start.
- Lack of attention to detail. I tend to be a 'big picture' thinker. Great for creativity, bad for follow-through.
- Attentiveness. As a counselor, I have cultivated my listening and empathy skills.
- Optimism- I was once told that I would never truely experience or understand depression because I'm too much of an optimist and I might feel depressed, but I will never live there. I am okay with that.
- I have a tendency to look for the best in people. Although I have done this naturally for years, since coming through my grad school experience, I have cultivated this tendency as it relates to creating a non-judgemental atmosphere in the therapy session.
- Objectivity. Again, this is a skill that I have worked on because it allows for better reasoning and logical thinking. Being able to avoid getting caught up in emotional, irrational thinking means that I am better able to help others (and myself) live happier, more fulfilling lives.
- Sense of humor. Admittedly, it is quirky and even cheesy, but it suits me and has served me well (most of the time).
Well, my favorite animal is the penguin. There are many traits about penguins that I could mention that are endearing when applied to human circumstances. They appear awkward on land, but are elegant and powerful in the right element (water). They are intelligent and clever in survival as well as socially.
However, the animal I would choose to be is Peregrine Falcon. Flying and speed! Woo hoo!
16. What are your 5 greatest accomplishments?
This is a difficutlt question to answer because it requires some qualifying criteria that are extremely subjective. I have no idea of they are my greatest accomplishments, but here are some things I am proud of:
- The feedback from individuals in congregations I have served has been encouraging. I have some regrets, but overall, I think fondly of the relationships with church folk.
- I am proud of the way that we have addressed the disease of Type 1 Diabetes as a family.
- Finishing my Master's and completing all of the requirements to become a LMFT in Texas was arduous, but worthwhile.
- An independant poll conducted in the Emery houshold has me in the top two contenders for "best parent"! Seriously, I am generally proud of my children and how we are raising them. Amelia and I are not only a great couple, I feel like we are fantastic parents.
- I am proud that I have accepted myself as a work in progress. I no longer feel inadequate, but recognize that it is okay to feel how I feel and accept myself where I am, knowing that I can grow and change as needed as life goes on.
I wish I could play a musical instrument. Piano or guitar or ... something more sophisticated than a recorder. Having said this, "Learn to play an instrument" is on my bucket list.
18. What has been the most difficult thing you have had to forgive?
I have plenty of things that I have done to hurt others that have taken a great deal of time, effort and emotional energy to get past and to forgive myself. However the hardest thing I've had to work through and forgive was my parent's divorce. I did a lot of internalizing of the whole situation and had to realign my thinking to understand that there was so much that I didn't know and could never completely understand that it was wrong to hold onto the hurt and disappointment. My anger and bitterness about it only held me back from healing and moving on and kept me from being able to have ongoing relationships with either one of my parents.
19. If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?
I love, love, love Europe, but I am not sure I would want to live there full time. I actually like West Texas: the landscape, the weather, the climate, the culture. Of course, I also enjoy traveling, so access to a better airport and transportation would be a plus.
20. Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.
- My earliest memories are all from living in Florida when I was 3-4 years old. I seem to remember going fishing with a little kid's "Peanuts" themed fishing rod, with my dad. I remember having neighbors that we played with a lot, other military families. I remember feeling it was very safe. Even after we moved to Athens, Greece, I remember doing a lot of exploring on my own. I may have been better supervised than I remember, but in all my memories, I was either with a friend or alone as I explored the neighborhoods we lived in.
- I loved the experiences I had growing up in Europe. Field trips were to castles and forrests. Living on military installations meant that we could roam around the housing areas knowing that things were safe for us and I remember hanging out with friends and sleepovers and lots of fun times. The food, the culture, languages, learning about our 'host nations' at school... all of those things were exciting. From 1980 to 1987, we lived and traveled in Greece, Italy, Germany, Belgium, Holland, England and France.
- My teenage years were full of adjustments as we transitioned to 1) living in Texas 2) Not moving every three years 3) normal teenage developmental stuff. School was fun and I learned a lot and made friends, but I mostly remember my summers. For the first couple of summers after we moved back to the states, I would typically ride my bike two miles from the house to the air base and spend my day at the officer's pool or the library. I was tanned and toned from biking and swimming almost every day. Then I got connected with the TTU/GTE prep program for a few summers at Texas Tech. I stunk at all things math and engineering, but I had LOTS of fun making friends and getting to feel grown up and sophisticated because it was on a college campus.
-jeff
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