Socratic Method in Parenting? Helping children develop good decision making.

Hello, readers.

I've had some thoughts mulling recently that I would like to share and about which I'd like some feedback.

It has been my experience that many parents under-utilize the power of questions in helping their child to make good decisions. What I mean by that is parents tend to do a lot more 'telling-their-child-how-to-behave' rather than helping them choose that behavior. Now, I don't know about you, but in general, doing something because I'm told to do it invites resistance on my part. In contrast, if I come to the conclusion of my own accord to behave a certain way, I am more likely to get to that behavior AND I'm more likely to have a better attitude about it.

In one of the parenting classes I teach, we talk about using short, directive statements that detail what action or behavior is desired. For instance, "I need you to pick up all the dirty clothes and put them in the clothes hamper" is more helpful to a kid than having a parent complain, "Goodness gracious! Your room is a pigsty! Why can't you keep things clean?!?" The former is non-blaming and contains direction whereas the latter is vague and invites comparison to a pig and recrimination as well . I understand that in many cases, a parent might say to me, concerning my example, "Jeff, we tried the first statement a hundred times before we got so frustrated that you are now hearing us say the second!" I get that. We have our days at the Emery household as well. However, the idea that I've bouncing around in my head is a complementary approach. I don't think it will or should replace positive, directive statements, but I think it has some helpful implications.

At some point, as parents, we become confident that our child(ren) know what needs to be done, or what behavior is expected, at any given point in time. For instance, I have confidence that my children know how to behave, but they lack the mental capacity to choose well when under stress (then again, we all do... on occasion).
So, if I have confidence that my child *knows* the right thing to do, then it doesn't make a whole lot of sense for me to tell her again, when I observe her choosing a poor behavior. What I mean to say is that the problem is not a lack of knowledge, it is an underdeveloped process of choosing, or decision making. So, as a parent, I need to learn a better way to help my children develop their decision making skills in a way that invites them to choose the better way.

Now, I need to digress for a moment to point out that it is possible to do the right thing the wrong way and thus muck it up. For instance, you can do things with sarcasm or with disdain or resentment that ruins the whole gesture. Let's say that I'm arguing with my wife and after a time, I can tell that neither of us is gaining any ground, so I apologize just to end the argument. "Fine, I'm sorry, okay? Whatever." See, now, I said the words... but my behavior, tone and attitude conveyed a different message. Not only was I not sorry when I said it, but I also left my partner feeling devalued as well.

So, as I explain the benefits of using questions to help develop good decision making in children, keep in mind that when our hearts are hurt... when we are embittered, angry or frustrated... this technique has the potential to backfire. Our frame of mind when using questions to help our children make good decisions needs to be free of trying to blame them or make them feel stupid for not seeing the 'obvious' answer. It needs to be a sincere effort to help them learn and grow and out of love for the individual. If your child can see your way of being toward them at that moment, it will help them be receptive to the teaching.

So, here is a conversation I had with my youngest daughter a while ago where I wanted her to choose the right thing instead of me forcing her to accept what I knew to be the right thing. Editorial comments are in parentheses.

Setup: Our heater was out over a weekend and we were using space heaters in the living room to keep warm. Eleanor was curled up on the couch and vocally complaining of being cold, so she asked if she could go change clothes. Amelia agreed and Ele left the room for a bit. When she returned, she was wearing a thin nightgown (pink and princess-y of course) which offered even less in the way of warmth than what she had been wearing. Amelia protested and told Ele to go put on long sleeves and pants. Ele threw a fit, claiming the nightgown was warmer. Am instructed Ele to go change and Ele just escalated the crying. I followed Ele to her room to help her process why she was misbehaving.

Me: Ele, why are you fussing?
Ele: (crying) Because I want to wear this dress and Mommy won't let me!
Me: I understand that you want to wear the nightgown, but you were complaining about being cold.
Ele: This is warm! Really!
Me: (pointing to the clothes in the floor next to her) I know mommy just wants to help you be warmer and I think that those clothes will do a better job.
Ele: No they won't! Please, just let me wear this!
Me: Ele, tell me, how is your behavior right now?
Ele: Bad....
Me: Well, Mommy has told you to change your clothes into pants and a long sleeve shirt. Are you doing what Mommy told you to do?
Ele: But, Daddy...
Me: Ele, answer me. Are you doing what Mommy told you to?
Ele: No...
Me: What is the right thing to do right now?
(This is the important question for her. Give her the opportunity to make the decision. I could just yell at her and make her do what she'd been told to do, but I think the investment in helping her make the decision for herself will pay off down the road)
Ele: I don't know!
Me: You don't know what the right thing to do is?
Ele: (pitifully) no...
Me: Okay, well, I have some stuff to do in the kitchen and I'll check back with you in a few minutes. In the meantime, why don't you sit on your bed and come up with something that might work for you right now.
(I left her for about five minutes and then came back)
Me: Ele, are you ready to talk? Did you think about the right thing to do?
Ele: Daddy, I really just want to wear my princess dress!
Me: I understand that, baby. I am sure that later, when it is bedtime, you can put that on. What do you need to wear right now?
Ele: (dithering) oh...those clothes (pointing at the jeans and shirt)... But I don't want to!
(At this point, the question was no longer about warmth, it was about obedience, so I made that overt)
Me: Eleanor, it seems like you are having a hard time being obedient. Being obedient means that even if you don't agree, you obey, or listen to, what Mommy and Daddy tell you to do. I understand what you want to do right now, but what is the right thing to do if you are going to be obedient?
Ele: I don't know!
Me: (getting frustrated) I just told you. You don't have to agree with Mommy, but you do need to obey her when she tells you to do something. Now, what is the right thing to do in order to be obedient?
Ele: (whining) ooohh...I just don't know.
Me: Well, I don't know either, baby. Why don't you take a few more minutes to think about it...
(I left for about five minutes more and then returned. Variations on this last part of the conversation occurred for the next 15 minutes, with breaks in between. Finally, Ele offered a compromise.)
Me: Well, did you figure out the right thing to do toward Mommy to show her that you are obedient?
Ele: How about if I put on this shirt, too? It is warm.
(This compromise was Ele trying to save face a little. It allowed her to comply with Amelia's directive, but to do it in her own way.)
Me: I think that would be fine. Now, when we are fussy at each other, what else do we need to do once we do what Mommy asked us to do?
Ele: I don't know what you mean.
Me: Well, you disobeyed Mommy and yelled and fussed at her. How do you need to make things right with her?
Ele: I need to tell her I'm sorry.
Me: That is a good start. After you tell her you are sorry, you need to behave in a helpful way so that we don't have go get fussy at each other again, k? I proud that you were able to think about how to be obedient and then you chose to do the right thing. (gives hugs)

Now, consider how this could have gone (and sometimes does!): Amelia and I both fuss/yell at Eleanor for not listening and command her to do as she is told. Ele would likely be resistant and defiant (how do you feel when when someone orders you around?), causing us to escalate things and threaten her with punishment if she doesn't comply. Then it moves from being a warmth issue or even an obedience issue and it becomes a power/control issue. The end result is that parents sometimes end up inviting the very behavior from their kids that they claim to dislike. The opposite is true as well. Sometimes kids tell me that they want their parents to stop yelling so much, but upon investigating their interactions, it becomes clear that the child's behavior invites their parents to yell.

So, why does questioning work better in the long run?
* It invites critical thinking because the child has to process the information, rather than having it force upon them by someone else's will.
* The very nature of it communicates that that person's opinion is valuable and that they are capable of making decisions.
* Done properly, it is empowering and promotes self-confidence.
* It models good development for the child, for later in life, so they can do it for their children
* Over time, it frees the parent from having to micro-manage their children.

I would appreciate feedback on this post. You can reply on my blogger.com page, on my Facebook wall (once this is imported) or send a note to jde95f (at) gmail (dot) com.

-jeff

My year in FB statuses

ACS Christmas performance is finished. Despite technical difficulties, the show must go on! Good job, all. (8:46pm)It is beginning to look a lot like Christmas... .in my personal checking account. *sigh* Always too much month left over at the end of the money. (3:15pm)Truth can take care of itself. It needs little defense from me. (1:01pm)#2 - you are always after 1 for me, but you precede 3, so that is something. Of the first ten digits, you were the first to not be odd. Thank you for that. When used as a divisor, you help me find what half would be, you rock! (7:42pm yesterday)I told my kids they'd better not step on any cracks! Sheesh! (7:26pm December 6th, 2010)Getting ready to go shoot an old friend I know from high school. (with a camera!) (2:52pm December 5th, 2010)"Cogito Egro Sum" was insufficient to explain the fundamental nature of our existence. I wouldn't be at all except for the others who shaped who I am. And so it is with each of us, we are who we are because of how others have influenced us. We exist in and because of relationship. (1:42am December 5th, 2010)Is about to start making Sausage Balls as a part of "Bread Sunday" at Minter tomorrow. Oh, yeah! (6:12pm December 4th, 2010)wonders whether activism via Facebook is effective or just self-aggrandizing or merely superficial. What cynical part of me is resisting changing my profile pic for a cartoon? (12:53am December 4th, 2010)My joy for the day: walking with Ele today, her holding my hand and skipping along next to me. (8:08pm December 3rd, 2010)A brown hair clip lying in the rug by the shower looks a lot like a ginormous cockroach at first glance when the light in the bathroom is first switched on. A sigh of relief often follows a fearsome cry when one discovers, thankfully, that one's eyesight isn't what it used to be. Just sayin'. (10:56pm December 2nd, 2010)A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world; everyone you meet is your mirror. -Ken Keyes, Jr. (10:14pm December 2nd, 2010)All three of my children sang to me tonight. What a blessing to hear these sweet voice doing something other than arguing :p (9:21pm December 2nd, 2010)Dear child, you know the phrase: Too good to last? Somehow, people became convinced that good things are rare and limited and have learned to expect them to end. Not so with my love for you. Unconditional and eternal. Truly, God. (11:52pm November 30th, 2010)Finishing off the pecan pie.... oooohhh, I'm gonna have a tummy ache later... (10:16pm November 29th, 2010)Keep MH in prayer today. Not only is she ill but she has a migraine as well. Poor thing has been in misery all night. (7:34am November 29th, 2010)... making Christmas greeting cards in Photoshop with family pics I took today. Fun! (9:01pm November 28th, 2010)Happiness is a Strawberry Dr Pepper from Sonic. Slurp, slurp....ghhxxhr.... strawberry caught on straw. Love it! (6:47pm November 28th, 2010)Has been in the checkout line so long that it would no longer be an impulse buy to get candy, but a matter of sustenance! Okay, not really... but still... (5:17pm November 27th, 2010)Has finished re-reading HP7 and is ready to go see the flick. (1:55pm November 27th, 2010)There is some serious holiday decorating going on around here.... (7:35pm November 26th, 2010)Just finished 'Tangled'. Four out of five in the ERS. Recommended. (4:28pm November 26th, 2010)Black Friday is skewed toward people who: 1) Have money to blow on "bargain deals" or 2)Are willing to go into debt for said deals and 3) are crazy enough to get up early enough to beat out the other weirdos. (10:30am November 26th, 2010)Breakfast of leftover pumpkin roll. Perfect! (9:47am November 26th, 2010)Time to eat... Electronics away, everyone! (1:37pm November 25th, 2010) Puppy chow, no bake cookies, pumpkin roll, pumpkin cookies... Start the holiday caloric intake. I've gained two lbs just breathing the air in the kitchen. (7:11pm November 24th, 2010)Amelia called me into the hallway to listen to the voices coming from Ele's room. Me (whispering): What? Ele is reading to Ethan... Am (whispering): No... He's teaching her... Sure enough, we stood there and listened for several minutes as Ethan patiently and encouragingly helped Ele read a level 1 reader. P-R-E-C-I-O-U-S!!! I've got the best kids. (11:00pm November 23rd, 2010)Downside: cancellations are frustrating and I don't get paid. Upside: I'm home earlier than expected and can see my family! (7:20pm November 23rd, 2010)Jamming out to Relient K's Christmas album. (9:03am November 23rd, 2010)Every blessing you pour out, I turn back to praise. When the darkness closes in, Lord, still I will say: Blessed be the name of the Lord! (12:44pm November 22nd, 2010)Feeling thankful today... Gearing up for a week full of thankfulness. What is something you are thankful for? (11:18am November 21st, 2010)Curtain call... That is all folks! (exit stage left). (9:54pm November 20th, 2010)Halftime at the evening performance of The Nutcracker. The score is: Rat King:0, Nutcracker Soldier:1, Ballerinas: 77. I think we will go into overtime in the Land of Sweets. (8:52pm November 20th, 2010)So proud of my kiddos. Just returned from the matinee of The Nutcracker. Great job! (5:04pm November 20th, 2010)While Am was stage-managing Ethan and Ele at Nutcracker, MH and I got some one-on-one time. Did some house cleaning, had a late night snack at DQ and spent birthday money at Wal-Mart on Magic: TG cards. Just taught MH how to play and she beat me! (1:17am November 20th, 2010)What if your behavior was the barometer by which your kids understood what was acceptable? (7:35pm November 18th, 2010)loves surprise gifts from friends. Especially Amazon.com surprises! (3:41pm November 18th, 2010)Whew. On my way home! (6:14pm November 17th, 2010)Bleh. My day isn't over yet. I want to see *my* family now please. (5:56pm November 17th, 2010)I'm thankful I know better than to look at my bank account to determine how blessed and rich I am. (11:43am November 17th, 2010)Quirky FB trend: send me a question in private message and I'll answer it in my status. I guess it is like a weird Jeopardy variant... (9:25am November 17th, 2010)Q: What size shoe do you wear and what style of shoes do you prefer? A: 12.5 wide or 13. I found that I prefer Nike sneakers. Others aren't as durable or comfortable. I'm hard on shoes. (7:51am November 17th, 2010)Quirky FB trend: send me a question in private message and I'll answer it in my status. I guess it is like a weird Jeopardy variant... (7:30am November 17th, 2010)By the numbers: 34 years not dead 14.5 years happily married (to the same person!) 3 fantastic children of blessing Over 50 birthday well-wishes 1 new toy for my birthday 4 great sisters 2 loving parents Over 750 hours into my licensure hours 78 minutes of food and fellowship with a great friend over lunch 4 hrs worth of unwatched shows in my Hulu.com queue 7 hrs of sleep to look forward to.... Good night, FB. (12:18am November 17th, 2010)Phew! Practicing for the Nutcracker is tough.... and I'm not even in it.... I'm just a supporting daddy. Can't wait to see my children perform this weekend! (10:49pm November 16th, 2010)Contemplating what I want to eat for lunch. (11:15am November 16th, 2010)Good night's sleep... Check. Healthy breakfast... Check. Hugs, kisses, well wishes from family and friends... Check, check, check. Today has a good start! (8:39am November 16th, 2010)Amelia blessed me with exactly what I've been wanting for a while: Bluetooth Stereo Headphones! *Sigh* Now, I get to wait 3 hours for them to charge up... (9:52pm November 15th, 2010)Probably as a result of not enough sleep, I am residing in a funk today. Help me count my blessings, friends. Comment on why I should be thankful today. Be creative. (12:33pm November 15th, 2010)*yawn* going to bed. See you tomor... later today. :) (3:08am November 15th, 2010) Small group= good food, great dessert, and even better fellowship. (7:40pm November 14th, 2010)Pretty sure I'm the only male at the Sugar Plum Fairy Tea, much less the only daddy. On the other hand I doubt I'd ever see the inside of the Abilene Women's Club otherwise. (2:10pm November 14th, 2010)Amelia's homemade chicken and dumplings fir lunch! Yummy! (11:39am November 14th, 2010)Up early to go judge debate rounds at AHS. Man, I miss this! (6:40am November 13th, 2010)We may complain a lot about the hassles of insurance and frustrations of walmart pharmacy... But tonight I am thankful that I have more than enough insulin for the next month to keep my kiddos alive and healthy with no impact to our monthly budget. Praise the Lord. (10:11pm November 11th, 2010)Childhood coping mechanisms become adult dysfunctions. (12:21pm November 11th, 2010)houseful of visitors this evening! Yay for friends! (8:56pm November 10th, 2010)Our accusing attitudes always come across, even if we try to mask them with airs of courtesy or with silence, because there's a perceptible difference between the person who cares and the person who's making an effort to make it appear that he cares. (What We Are) -The Arbinger Institute (5:32pm November 10th, 2010)You've got to wonder about the wisdom of requiring employees to fill out a form to document their outreach efforts when filling out the form takes more time and effort than the actual visit. /boggles at the red tape (3:21pm November 10th, 2010)A stressed out lady tells me her mantra to cope with all her junk: "Cry me a river, then build a bridge and Get Over It". (12:06pm November 10th, 2010)stewardesses, lollipop - the longest words that can be typed solely with one hand, left and right, respectively. (9:31pm November 9th, 2010)My daughter, after a shower says, "Daddy, I think I need some new underwear." My response: "All purchasing of girl's undergarments will be done by your mother." Her reply, "Then will you buy me a pony?" (9:29pm November 9th, 2010)Pizza Hut cooked dinner. Nana made dessert: pecan pie. *sigh* I'm getting an early start on the fattening of the holiday turkey. (8:23pm November 9th, 2010)At cub scouts with my son. Learning to tie knots. (6:50pm November 9th, 2010)Looking forward to a busy but productive day. (8:47am November 9th, 2010)Last month, we had a water leak at the house and the water bill was 3x normal. Today, The City Utility Office gave me a 'leak adjustment' that totally covered the overage. Nice! (8:46am November 9th, 2010)NASCAR: a more exciting version of traffic. -Demetri Martin (3:29pm November 8th, 2010)Textbook misunderstanding: after telling my mom about a toy ethan is wanting, she asks,"Now why does Ethan want a Kung-Fu ballerina?" ...pause...Me:"No, he wants to get a Kung-zhu Battle Arena..." (2:50pm November 7th, 2010)I heard a 'Snap, Crackle, Pop' this morning... When I was stretching. No, I didn't have rice krispies in bed with me... (7:56am November 7th, 2010)Watching 'Julie and Julia'. It is remarkably entertaining. (12:04am November 7th, 2010)Spent a great day hanging out with my favorite 7 year old boy. (4:07pm November 6th, 2010)You know you're a parent when you are willing to spend fifteen minutes in the toy section listening to your child discuss the relative merits of zhu-zhus vs kung-zhus with another kid. (1:38pm November 6th, 2010)Helped Ethan and other boy scouts collect Canned goods for the food bank this morning. (11:41am November 6th, 2010)Had a great Friday. Here's to a great Saturday! Huzzah! (12:14am November 6th, 2010)Is being stood up by a family he scheduled with *last night* AND missing lunch at the same time.... Grrrr (12:06pm November 4th, 2010) In a melancholy mood today. Feeling a little fake as I meet new contacts to tell them about our services when it is likely that my program won't exist in a year .... (12:29pm November 3rd, 2010)Jeff, escorting the kids from Nana's house back to his house: "Grrr... I don't know what's up with them tonight. It isn't like herding cats... it is like I'm herding turtles. Whiny turtles." (9:30pm November 2nd, 2010)Upon checking his BG, Ethan announces, "It's still over 500..." in a guilty sort of voice... so I asked, "How much candy did you eat earlier?" "Well, just one Reese's cup. And one dark chocolate mini. And a regular chocolate. And a krackle. Oh, and one candy pumpkin, but it was just sitting there on my insulin kit..." Me: "But why did you think you needed to eat it?" Ethan: "I don't know..." (9:19pm November 2nd, 2010)Breaking my fast with hot chai tea and a cinnabon. Good morning, Tuesday. (8:40am November 2nd, 2010)I will not procrastinate on Facebook today... I will not procrastinate on Facebook today... I will not... darnit! (10:38am November 1st, 2010)So far, this is the oldest I've ever been. (10:28pm October 31st, 2010)I think that the kids collected as much tonight as we gave out at the party yesterday. (8:25pm October 31st, 2010)Is trick-or-treating... I mean. I'm taking the kids. (7:02pm October 31st, 2010)Trying to get pics from yesterday's Halloween Party posted... (4:53pm October 31st, 2010)Just rescued his iPhone from the clutches of 'Angry Birds' obsessed children. (1:07pm October 31st, 2010)Happy Holy Day! Praise God, all creation. Praise him for his steadfast love and his mercy. Give grace to others in the measure to which it was offered to you by the King of all creation. Have a fantastic day. (8:49am October 31st, 2010)Watching 'Private Eyes' with 10 4th graders. (7:48pm October 30th, 2010)Ethan, jumping out from behind a corner, to Mary Hannah: "Raaarrr! I'm a ferocious monster!!!" MH: "Awwww, that's cute!" Ethan: "I am NOT cute!" (9:25am October 30th, 2010)Hello, Saturday! Yay for the annual Emery Halloween party! Gonna be a fun day. (9:08am October 30th, 2010)Ethan took the Cinnamon challenge... and failed, but still 'won' the bet for his effort. (10:54pm October 29th, 2010)Listening to 'The Monster Mash' and getting dinner ready... (5:37pm October 29th, 2010)In cross plains... Almost home! (3:41pm October 29th, 2010)Enjoyed two nights of a hotel room all to himself but is seriously missing his family. Can't wait to be home and having Halloween fun this weekend. (8:10am October 29th, 2010)Learned so far: my session speaker ends too many sentences with prepositions and pronounces 'often' with a hard 'T' instead of leaving it silent. (11:12am October 28th, 2010)She not only saw the light at the end of the tunnel, she became the light for others - Kobi Yamadu (10:13am October 28th, 2010)How you know the planners of your conference cater to the high female population: the free breakfast is yogurt and fruit instead of donuts and bacon... (8:45am October 28th, 2010)Don't eat the marshmallow! (1:25am October 27th, 2010)just finished teaching/facilitating his first Court - ordered Parenting Class. Success! Lots of good feedback. (10:17pm October 26th, 2010)Ele, when asked what she was going to dress up as for Halloween: A fairy princess ballerina.... kitty. I think she covered all her costume wishes in one. -ha! (5:13pm October 26th, 2010)Ele: What is the Tooth Fairy's name? Me: Um... It is just 'Tooth Fairy'. Ele: why isn't it something like... 'Christina Flower'? Me: ... (9:14pm October 25th, 2010) Relationship is a word we use to describe how two or more things interact and influence each other. Bad relationships happen without much effort. Good relationships take work. (3:32pm October 25th, 2010)Feels saddened, having talked to a teen who has given up on his parents loving him. Got to practice just listening today. He wasn't ready to hear how to change his thinking yet, he just needed to feel like *someone* was listening to him. (1:20pm October 25th, 2010)I don't always mind you showing up, Monday, but do you have to do it so early every week? (7:18am October 25th, 2010)One of the top complaints I get from the kids I work with in counseling is that their parent(s)/adults don't listen to them. How often do we just listen for understanding? Not to correct, teach, remind, judge or dismiss them... just to understand? (12:00am October 25th, 2010)Bleh, Hulu.com is blocked at Henrick. :( (10:14pm October 24th, 2010)At the end of 2 years of therapy, my therapist said something that brought tears to my eyes: "No hablo Ingles..." (4:53pm October 24th, 2010)Q: How many therapists does it change a light bulb? A: How many do *you* think it takes? (4:53pm October 24th, 2010)Yuck! Ele and Ethan both have strep. Fun times in the Emery house. (2:09pm October 24th, 2010)Sitting at the civic center, waiting to hear MH and the others in Chorus Abilene's group perform. (7:12pm October 23rd, 2010)Three days this week = early morning appointments at the client's request. Everyone of them has been a no - show. Bleh. TGIF. (9:23am October 22nd, 2010)Goodbye, Trey. *sniff* (7:55am October 22nd, 2010)The 4th grade chapel helped me start the day with a positive attitude! But now I'm on my way to work... we'll see how it goes. (8:54am October 21st, 2010)Yay! got a new modem installed and restored wireless access at mi casa! We've been relegated to using our 3g phone to do any internet stuff for the past week. (8:56pm October 20th, 2010)is wondering if FB will provide some sort of filter to allow individuals to hide friend's status updates where the last 10 updates have been sports related scores, gloating, taunting or otherwise obsessed. Seriously, it is about as annoying as Farmville updates.... (5:57am October 20th, 2010)Ran across the phrase 'disciplined self-indulgence'. Hmmm is that like limiting myself to only 6 Oreos at a time? (10:58am October 19th, 2010)Typical Monday morning of no-shows. I'm getting impatient waiting. (11:12am October 18th, 2010)Love me some homemade sausage balls! Had fun making them with the kiddos an I'm looking forward to fun and fellowship with friends tonight! (4:25pm October 16th, 2010)Successfully slept in for the first time in ages! Now to conquer the lawn... (9:36am October 16th, 2010)At ACS game with kiddos. Wife is shopping. Should I be afeared? (9:07pm October 15th, 2010)Sharkey's for lunch with my wife! Happy Friday! (12:35pm October 15th, 2010)My sweet tea from Chick-fil-a tastes soapy. :( (11:47am October 15th, 2010)"Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is the probable reason why so few engage in it." - Henry Ford (1:08pm October 14th, 2010)is poor in liquid assets, but I got statements from retirement accounts and we've got a good start. So... I guess it'll get better. For now, I'll focus on the non-material abundance in my life: family, friends and fun. (10:19pm October 13th, 2010)Why do we bring misery on ourselves? Why are we blind to our role in it when it comes? (no, not me personally, but it became apparent to me today as I dug into someone's story with them) (2:12pm October 13th, 2010)Catching up on Failblog.org and then bed. Night! (1:14am October 13th, 2010) has developed a nervous tic in his right eyebrow. Very annoying. (10:58am October 12th, 2010)has a case of the blahs. Procrastination and stagnation are setting in. Motivation to do anything productive is very low. (10:46am October 12th, 2010)There is no such thing as a resistant client, only an inflexible therapist. -deShazer (3:47pm October 11th, 2010)Monday, Monday. *sigh* That is all. (2:38pm October 11th, 2010)You and I wake up in a jail cell together. Using only FOUR (4) words, what is the first thing you say to me? (post on your status to continue the fun) (7:11pm October 10th, 2010)0101010 = 42 (7:08pm October 10th, 2010)Parents- you are not raising children. You are raising responsible adults who just happen to be children right now. (11:44am October 9th, 2010)Thinks parents should have to get CEUs or demonstrate acceptable levels of skill each year they have kids at home. CLEP test to get out of a parenting class, maybe? (11:05am October 9th, 2010)Seek first to understand then to be understood. (9:59am October 9th, 2010)Stayin alive... (1:29pm October 8th, 2010)Peace out, sweet dreams. Tomorrow is payday and I'll have money in da bank! (for about 10 minutes). (1:01am October 8th, 2010)Escaping into Hulu land. (11:34pm October 7th, 2010)Love compels us to behave lovingly. Sin constrains us from being holy. (3:25pm October 7th, 2010)Who needs sleep? Oh, that is not a question, it is a song by the Barenaked Ladies. Good stuff. (1:54am October 7th, 2010)Ethan, after spending so much time in the *shower* that his fingers are prune-y, casually comments, "Dad, I think MH is going to have to take a shower in the morning. The water is all cold." As if his 45 minute shower had nothing to do with that fact.... (8:44pm October 6th, 2010)Blaming doesn't ever help. Blaming is a behavior that we use to justify feelings of anger, bitterness or resentment. Assigning responsibility or taking it is different from blaming. Blame accuses and puts people into a defensive position, from which it is difficult to recover. (9:37pm October 4th, 2010)Enjoyed the sense of community that hit when I walked into Los Arcos for lunch, looked around and realized I was friends with at least half of the other patrons. Took longer to say hi and sit down than it did to order. (1:36pm October 3rd, 2010)You cannot truly love another if you do not love yourself. Oh, and God is love. Tru dat. It's in the Bible. If you want to know love, know God. (1:04am October 3rd, 2010)Dinner menu: Greek Chicken, Fries, Rice, Greek Salad, Feta Cheese. That, my friends, is a recipe for delicious! Yum! (5:54pm October 2nd, 2010)Heard from the back of the house (around Ethan's room): Ugh! I don't like having sisters! It is SO annoying! (4:53pm October 2nd, 2010)Ready, set, MOW! Hello yardwork. (10:20am October 2nd, 2010)Making French Toast for breakfast. Hello Saturday. (8:19am October 2nd, 2010)Ending his date night with Amelia by watching "Date Night". Bonzai's was good, shopping was fun. Now for popcorn, chocolate, laughter and cuddles on the couch. (10:01pm October 1st, 2010)It is not just what you say, it is how you say it. It is not just what you do, it is how you do it. It is not just what you think, it is how you think it. Where is your heart about the situation? (4:56pm October 1st, 2010)In the car yesterday, I hear MH say, "Die, Piggy". I think out loud, "You're a little young for Lord of the Flies." MH says, "Huh? I'm playing Angry Birds on mom's iPod" My daughter is an iPodperson. (1:16pm October 1st, 2010) Me, packing for an overnight trip as a kid: Underwear, shirt, toothbrush, hat. MH, packing for an overnight trip: "Well, Eva gave me a list of everything we'll need... clothes, sleeping bag, a flashlight, my DS, Littlest Pet Shops, books, my iPod, a pillow, Lucky Bear, Blankey.....(the list goes on for literally 3 more minutes)" Me: Really? (11:29am October 1st, 2010)likes taking long trips in cars... good conversation. Thanks, Abby & Trey Gibson (5:34pm September 29th, 2010)Corporate kickball... Win (1:55pm September 29th, 2010)All behavior is communication. All communication is subject to interpretation by the receiver. What is your behavior communicating? Is that what you meant? (10:35pm September 27th, 2010)Google, you used to be just another search engine to me, but now you are so much more. A research assistant, a web sales partner, keeper of my correspondence, a source of information. You always seem to have an answer for me. Thanks for being there, and Happy Birthday! (12:31pm September 27th, 2010)Wanting to be sweet with Amelia, I told the kids that to share "my" Oreos, they had to give Mommy kisses. After delivering to her, the kids decided to gang up on me and give kisses. Feeling playful, I ran to my room and shut the door. Ethan: Daddy, open up! We have kisses! Ele: Daddy, come out! MH: Wait, if he's in the room, we can have ALL the Oreos! I tell you, she is scary smart! (8:19pm September 26th, 2010)Married folk: how have you demonstrated your love to your spouse today? (6:56pm September 26th, 2010)Sleep, why do I fight with you? You invite me to rest, but I resist. It is not that I don't want to be with you, I do... but... *sigh*, okay, okay. Logging off... (11:52pm September 25th, 2010)Drinking some hot tea with yummy flavored creamer, eating pear cake with psssshht (canned whipped cream). A nice peaceful evening watching Dexter with my wife. That's right : spouse, sweets, serial killer Ahhhh. (9:39pm September 25th, 2010)I brought two coffee mugs to the workshop, to hold the promotional pens and pencil I offered. When I got back from lunch, not only was I out of pens and pencils, but they'd taken my coffee mugs, too! (2:25pm September 25th, 2010)Is very underwhelmed with Peet's coffee house. 1) took more than 10 minutes to make my order. 2) i paid for a twenty oz and got almost half of it as foam. 3) it didn't taste good Bleh. Hello work Saturday, rain and all. (8:51am September 25th, 2010)Thought for the day: We mark the passing of one's physical age with birthdays. We mark the growth of one's knowledge and wisdom with degrees and diplomas. How do we measure the growth and development of one's emotional self? Is your emotional age commensurate with your physical age? Do you have an emotional Ph.D? (12:55am September 24th, 2010)Modern Family, The Middle... shows that entertain and give insight into family dynamics. :) (11:52pm September 23rd, 2010)Is worn out, empty, drained and otherwise done for the day. (6:27pm September 22nd, 2010)From an experiment on hugging, we also know that oxytocin is naturally released in the brain after a 20 second hug from a partner... triggering the brain's trust circuits. So don't let a guy hug you unless you plan to trust him. - The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine, MD (9:14pm September 21st, 2010)Even as I celebrate my survival of Monday, Tuesday sneaks upon me while I sleep. (10:28pm September 20th, 2010)10:00 no showed, 11:00 wasn't available... 4pm canceled, 5pm rescheduled. Was feeling discombobulated when Am called. Ethan's insulin pump messed up and I had to run by the school to change it. BUT... while there, I got to kiss all three of my kids, who were thrilled to see me. Take that, Monday! (1:28pm September 20th, 2010)For yer Pirate-y pleasure, mates! http://oldpoetry.com/opoem/45732-Young-Ewing-Allison-Derelict (11:49am September 19th, 2010)Sept 19th! Talk like a Pirate day! So...Don't forget to switch your Facebook language to: Pirate. Scroll down to the bottom of the page and there is a hyperlink on the bottom left corner. It probably says, "English" Click it and a dialog box will open with options. Select "Pirate". Enjoy, Matey! (12:16am September 19th, 2010)Ready to be done with today. Bored out of my mind, but my kids have been SOOO well behaved, other people have complimented them! (7:09pm September 18th, 2010)Home from the WTFair and Rodeo. Lotsa fun. Tired out. Sugared up. Showered over, beddied in . Good night. (11:35pm September 17th, 2010)MH, during the Barrel Racing: Daddy, I need you to get me a horse! Please! Right now!!! (9:29pm September 17th, 2010)Ele, bored with the rodeo: I'm hungry.... For cotton candy!!! (8:07pm September 17th, 2010)Ethan, watching the calf wrangling event: it would be more fun if they let all the calves go at once instead of one at a time. (8:00pm September 17th, 2010)Had five sessions, one meeting, one no show, three hours of drive time. One session was great, three were highly charged and one turned into a two hour crisis session. Picking up Chinese food and headed home! (8:04pm September 15th, 2010) Had five sessions, one meeting, three hours of drive time and one (8:01pm September 15th, 2010)Sometimes, I get a brief glimpse of God's provision in my life. All the years I've prayed over my children ... even the rare moments that God pulls aside the veil which shrouds our vision and lets us see them with His eyes, those moments bring astonishing insight into the heart of God. Can I be so blessed? Amen and amen. (2:08am September 15th, 2010)People respond primarily to the way we FEEL toward them... This works both ways. While a loving and benevolent attitude will show through even clumsy behavior, so a self-concerned and blaming attitude will show through skilled behavior. (No Other Way: The Source of Hope for Organizations of the Future)- The Arbinger Institute (2:34pm September 14th, 2010)Ring, Ring "Hello?" me: Hey, it's Jeff. "Oh, can I call you back? I'm right in the middle of [something]" me: Sure, no worries. Hang up. me: (wondering aloud) Then why did you answer the phone? (10:43am September 14th, 2010)looked at my schedule this week and it stinks. Days are pretty empty and I've got about 14 appointments from 4-7 PM every night this week. Bleh. (1:50pm September 13th, 2010)Thinks that conversations with name droppers are alternately fascinating and annoying. (11:08am September 13th, 2010)Getting ready to worship God with the church! (8:31am September 12th, 2010)Enjoyed my Saturday with Ethan, Ele and friends, but I'm missing my Amelia and MH tonight. Come home soon, ladies. (k) Mwah! (12:08am September 12th, 2010)9 years ago, I was getting my 4 month old daughter ready to go to the sitter so I could go to work when I turned on the television to discover every channel broadcasting the same tragic news.... Where were you? (12:32pm September 11th, 2010)Ele and I just made some muffins for breakfast. Blueberry, because they are Ethan's favorite. Sweet of her, yes? (8:28am September 11th, 2010)Well, Ele was the big winner on game 3, and Ethan's three game average was only two points less than mine, but I eked out a win. (10:47pm September 10th, 2010)First, dinner, then a Wii bowling tournament between Daddy, Ethan, and Ele. Reflex controls = the great equalizer. Ele will probably win. (5:47pm September 10th, 2010)Amelia and MH left on an overnight Girl Scout trip this morning. Ele, upset, got in bed with me and said, "I'm gonna miss Mommy." Me: "They'll be okay, sweetie." Ele: "But you'll have to sleep all alone." Me: "Will you need to give me cuddles so I can go to sleep?" Ele: "Yes.... but you can't snore." (7:29am September 10th, 2010)With no options, a person feels trapped and begins to lose hope. However, there are always options, if one chooses to look for them. (3:59pm September 9th, 2010)I like the man I am. (12:44am September 9th, 2010)Headed home and then to Bible study with the church! Yay! (5:28pm September 8th, 2010)Best Labor Day on record. :) Rested, rejuvenated and ready to go on. (11:51pm September 6th, 2010)Home a day early, but the upside is that there is time to recover from traveling, do laundry, finish homework and post pics to FB. :) (1:41pm September 6th, 2010)Good morning, holiday. How nice to see you. (11:02am September 6th, 2010)Home! Night night. (12:41am September 6th, 2010)Headed for the UFO museum and research center... (3:13pm September 5th, 2010)Schedule change... Roswell today then home! (12:10pm September 5th, 2010)Wonders if there is a need for LMFTs in Cloudcroft... (5:11pm September 4th, 2010)I ran into my friends, Kyle and Stephanie Rosebaugh deep in Carlsbad caverns yesterday! How cool! (2:17pm September 3rd, 2010)In Cloudcroft!! It smells/feels/tastes/sounds/looks glorious!!! (1:17pm September 3rd, 2010) Two blocks away from the gas station we'd stopped at, ethan says ,"uh, I forgot to go potty." these are the best years of our lives! >grin< (11:27am September 3rd, 2010)After breakfast, headed to Cloudcroft! Yay mountains! (8:59am September 3rd, 2010)Is catching upon FB mobile because I had no signal for about five hours when I was 750ft below ground! Seriously AT&T, why doesn't your 3G coverage include spelunking areas? (10:33pm September 2nd, 2010)I can see mountains! Real ones that are higher than 1500 ft. Hah. (12:16pm September 2nd, 2010)Is experiencing the Land of Enchantment. (11:46am September 2nd, 2010)Those times when we feel most miserable, offended, or angry are invariably the occasions when we're also most absorbed in ourselves and most anxious or suspicious or fearful, or in some other way concerned about ourselves. (Warner) - The Arbinger Institute (1:07am September 1st, 2010)Sleep, my old friend. We need to meet up more often... (10:44pm August 30th, 2010)And, again, un-friending has resulted in restoring some calm. How did I get all these people on my friends list? Oh, yeah, I added them. Has anyone else ever added someone just because, only to regret it later after reading the junk they post? (4:03pm August 29th, 2010)Okay, Jonathan, I've started watching the Transformer cartoon DVDs and so far it is just painful... (12:57pm August 29th, 2010)Anyone in the Abilene area interested in a fantastic portrait Photo shoot? I'd like to make some money before next weekend. Contact me and let's make a deal for some photos! (3:51pm August 28th, 2010)Realized that reading some people's status updates affects his calm and then realized that restoring his calm was as easy as removing them from his friend's list. (3:16pm August 28th, 2010)MH was driving me crazy about doing a craft project which I'd already told her shed have to wait to do it. I took the jar away from her and put it out of reach on top of the fridge. She grinned really big at me, reached up and took it down. When did she get so tall?!? (5:52pm August 27th, 2010)HR arranged for a Masseuse to come give massages today at work. Ahhhh.... THAT'S how to improve morale! :) (2:27pm August 27th, 2010)Is it bad that I'm already looking forward to *next* Friday? (8:33am August 27th, 2010)My wife got her iPhone 4 today. Sancho is seeming inadequate right now... (9:20pm August 26th, 2010)Before you worry too much about how stressed out you are, remember that God is on your side! The Creator of the universe wants you to rest in his strength, trust him to be in control of your life and depend on him to see you through rough times. Are you struggling? Rejoice, the Almighty is as close as your next prayer. (10:18am August 26th, 2010)Goodbye, Wednesday. You and chocolate did right by me today. See you next week! (11:17pm August 25th, 2010)Halfway thru the week. I think I need chocolate to make it the rest of the week... (7:57am August 25th, 2010)32 28 32 N, 99 42 58 W (11:07pm August 24th, 2010)Apparently, you can't go crazy by yourself. You have to be driven there. (2:53pm August 24th, 2010)Oh Lord, it's hard to to be humble.... (2:33pm August 24th, 2010)Kids need love the most when they are acting the most unlovable. -Erma Bombeck(?) (2:22pm August 23rd, 2010)Back at work. Looking at Staples(tm) catalog and wishing the "easy" button really worked... (10:13am August 23rd, 2010)Eating sunflower seeds and thinking about the families I'll be serving this week. (11:19pm August 22nd, 2010)Family game night! Playing Dicecapades. (8:06pm August 22nd, 2010) I took a look at my reflection in the mirror this morning and thought, "At least I know I'm not a vampire." (8:42am August 22nd, 2010)wonders what next week will hold... (2:02am August 22nd, 2010)I Understand that I come across as condescending to others sometimes. This is not because I don't like you, it is my way of compensating for my insecurities. And, I'm smarter than you. That is all. (7:30pm August 20th, 2010)Yay, Trey gave me a ladder to get out of my box! Let's hope it helps. (10:44am August 20th, 2010)Dear Friday, what's going on? I had such high hopes for today and so far, it feels like you are trying to make me miserable. Bah. If your intention was to tick me off, mission accomplished! (9:59am August 20th, 2010)Dear Friday, I'm glad you are here. I've been thinking about you all week! (7:08am August 20th, 2010)My son is beatboxing... (8:16pm August 19th, 2010)So, I've come to the point where I'm past the denial that I'm stressed out. I'm being mindful of my stressors, but I'm curious... on a scale of 1-10 (low-high) how stressed would you consider yourself? ie, I would have rated myself at a 5 last week, which would have meant to me that I knew I had stress but felt I was coping with it well. Now, I'd put myself at a 7 or maybe an 8. How about you, and why? (9:16am August 19th, 2010)What would we be without wishful thinking? (1:55am August 19th, 2010)So after my rough morning start, I'm a little frazzled, bit stressed, when God says to me, he says, "Child, calm down. I've got this. Winds, waves, storm... just distractions. Hold me hand, it's gonna be alright." (12:25pm August 18th, 2010)Thinks he should go back to bed and start the day over. (10:14am August 18th, 2010)The staff at Advance Auto parts is pretty helpful, the other customers, not so much. Yes, I'm talking about you, rude lady who thinks her needing a certain brand of synthetic oil is more deserving of assistance than any if the other customers' needs. (9:47am August 18th, 2010)Car batteries pass on so dramatically. They die! RIP, old battery. (8:51am August 18th, 2010)Is stuck in limbo... er... Wal-mart. *sigh* (8:45am August 18th, 2010)Paperwork, how I revile thee. Thou tauntest me with your imagined urgency, inflating your importance and threatening my peace. Were it within my power, I would banish thee to the outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth! Too dramatic? Yeah, probably. (7:40pm August 17th, 2010)A mundane evening of grocery shopping, a simple PB&J for a late dinner and reruns. How awesome is that?!? I needed mundane tonight. (11:10pm August 16th, 2010)Diabetes on the mind tonight. Hate it. (11:50pm August 15th, 2010)Worship at Mission Abilene, lunch and swimming with friends. Nice Sunday. (1:20pm August 15th, 2010)Printing pics for scrapbooking. My hobby and Am's hobby go hand in hand. :) (11:50pm August 14th, 2010)Aaaannndd.... We're home! Yay! (8:23pm August 14th, 2010)In Albany! Almost home. (7:35pm August 14th, 2010)Stopped to visit the Brumleys in Wichita Falls! (4:39pm August 14th, 2010)Crossing the Red. Back in Texas! (2:39pm August 14th, 2010)Ironic that my last status update dealt with gluttony, but I skipped breakfast and am now waiting on lunch... I'm hungry. (12:14pm August 14th, 2010)I've never been drunk, thus never hungover. But overeating has it's own uncomfortable consequences. Surprisingly, the glutton in me doesn't learn from his mistakes either. (9:47am August 14th, 2010) Urp! They should make a t-shirt that has 'I ate too much at Ted's Cafe Escondido'. I'd buy one... (3:08pm August 13th, 2010)MH A1C is higher at 10... Making adjustments. Ethan is lower at 8.7... Yeah! Headed in the right direction. (10:58am August 13th, 2010)In Oklahoma! Sooner rather than later... Ha! (7:44am August 13th, 2010)Stopping at IHOP for breakfast, Ethan comments, "Oh, boy! We get to have pancakes for breakfast! I've never had pancakes for breakfast before!". Seriously? Do we only ever do breakfast for dinner these days? Ha. (6:45am August 13th, 2010)It is almost 4 AM and we're setting off on our whirlwind trip to OKC and back. *Yawn* Giddyap.... (4:00am August 13th, 2010)MH rode home in the car with me and we chatted and laughed. Then she reached over and held my hand. Best.feeling.ever. I love being a Daddy. (9:26pm August 12th, 2010)Parmesan Goldfish crackers, you have been granted a reprieve from my destructive snacking tendencies. You have Cinnamon Teddy Grahams to thank. (4:22pm August 12th, 2010)Is working on being appropriately assertive. (1:12pm August 12th, 2010)Is signing up for ballet and jazz dance classes... (9:30am August 12th, 2010)Parmesan Goldfish are dying by the handfuls... RIP delicious fishes... (2:48am August 11th, 2010)cramming more into my morning than many people do in a lifetime... that's Monday for ya. (11:14am August 9th, 2010)Up and at 'em, folks. It's Monday again. (8:44am August 9th, 2010)Going to bed after TROUNCING my buddy Beja in Scrabble and then a three hour conversation about other stuff. Now to see if I can get to sleep... (3:22am August 9th, 2010)All behavior is learned behavior. How did we learn how to be good Christians? Who do you emulate? (9:37am August 8th, 2010)Out to dinner with two other couples, no kids. Topic of discussion? Our kids. :) (8:53pm August 7th, 2010)Wonders if the yardwork is gonna get done today... (9:37am August 7th, 2010)New Horizons BEST camp v. 2.0 is done! Lots of improvement, pots of fun! (12:22pm August 6th, 2010)Amelia has a mega-migraine :( MH made dinner! We are all in whisper mode as we enjoy Southwest Fajita wraps. (6:56pm August 5th, 2010)up early for some running around... (6:09am August 4th, 2010)is combining 'Oreo Cookie Therapy' with 'Hulu Queue Therapy' for some stress relief. (11:21pm August 3rd, 2010)After a full day that ended in continued frustration work issues 8 have decided that Oreos and milk will make things seem better. (7:50pm August 3rd, 2010)My get up and go done got up and went! Perhaps running a half day camp, four groups and two individual sessions in one day was a Bad plan. (2:56pm August 3rd, 2010)had an excellent nap before bedtime. :) (4:14am August 3rd, 2010)Hmmm. Late dinner of some excellent beef stew. Now the question is: to Snickers or not to Snickers? Too late at night for a candy bar? What advice do you have for me? (10:09pm August 2nd, 2010)Is losing hope for office communication and common sense. (12:47pm August 2nd, 2010) Just finished "The Bucket List". 5 on the ERS. Great movie. Right up there with "My Life", and "Mr. Magorium's Magic Emporium" for movies that address how to cope with the dilemma of how to live while dying. Highly recommended. (9:36pm August 1st, 2010)Going to see Inception! Yay. (1:05pm August 1st, 2010)Trying to schedule a double date with friends. Four iPods, two paper calendars came out and fifteen minutes later we found a time with no conflicts. (7:48pm July 31st, 2010)Hey, 2010, what is the hurry? Why are you going so fast? Seems like yesterday you promised me all summer to get stuff done and now you are ready to be moving on to fall? What's up with that? (10:49am July 31st, 2010)Is being allowed to moonlight. Allowed. (4:27pm July 30th, 2010)Busy day with back to back appointments! (12:12pm July 29th, 2010)Is watching 2012. What a disaster! (10:36pm July 28th, 2010)is consuming mid-afternoon chocolate. (3:30pm July 28th, 2010)Is perpetuating the Tooth Fairy mythos... and I'm out $4... (11:41pm July 27th, 2010)Wants to go see Inception. (7:12pm July 27th, 2010)How will your words influence your child's decisions? (10:43am July 27th, 2010)Tuesday dawns with a sick kid, full schedule and end-of-month paperwork looming... (9:20am July 27th, 2010)Back at work, playing catch-up. Unless I manage to schedule a client for today, will likely be tied to desk doing paperwork all day. Thanks, Monday. (10:34am July 26th, 2010)Oh so great to be home... But... There's laundry fir Amelia to do and I have been tasked with cleaning out leftover food stuffs that have been untouched for too long in the fridge... Baths for the kids and then to bed so we can start our week off tomorrow (9:36pm July 25th, 2010)Home again, greeted by the California cousins and papa's hamburgers. Great homecoming. (6:22pm July 25th, 2010)Leaving Brownwoood in the dust... Almost home. (2:51pm July 25th, 2010)Dear Pappasitos, thanks for making our last meal in Austin a fabulous one! Ethan appreciated his birthday surprise, too! (6:45pm July 24th, 2010)At Jungle Java, a cross between Starbucks and McDonald's playplace. Kids run and play while parents sip their frappachinos. Good marketing. (12:57pm July 24th, 2010)Another great night in Austin. Finished the conference this afternoon, picked the kids up and took them swimming. Picnic dinner and then to the Park and the outdoor theater. A fantastic production of Annie. Great time had by all. (1:06am July 24th, 2010)High on the hill, waiting for Annie to start, one of the sponsors came by and invited us to a front row seat! Score! (8:34pm July 23rd, 2010)Going swimming with the kids! (2:01pm July 23rd, 2010)What you praise is what you get. (11:16am July 23rd, 2010)is listening to a Ph.D expound on ADD and ADHD, from a purely medical model. My blood pressure is rising. (9:00am July 23rd, 2010)Happy birthday to my dear son, whom I love deeply. HB, Ethan! (8:38am July 23rd, 2010)Psych is my only friend tonight. Be good to me, Hulu. (11:14pm July 22nd, 2010) For dinner tonight, I had beef, chicken, shrimp and pork. Yay for buffets! Good choice, Ethan! (9:18pm July 22nd, 2010)Ladybird Johnson wildflower park rocked. Great family fun! (8:26pm July 22nd, 2010)Had a great afternoon session, but remains frustrated by work stuff. (5:17pm July 22nd, 2010)When I become a professional speaker, I want to develop a strategy for defeating the unsightly foam that forms in the corner of the mouth, or the white flecks that form on the lips... Ewww! (2:42pm July 22nd, 2010)Mack McCarter: Love is like a river, but you don't have to wear my swimsuit to swim in it. (10:51am July 22nd, 2010)Hmmm. Spiritual aspects of chemical dependency treatment and recovery. This speaker sounds promising. (10:39am July 22nd, 2010)Family time! (4:52pm July 21st, 2010)Literal laugh out loud! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj-x9ygQEGA&feature=youtube_gdata Total eclipse of the heart. (2:52pm July 21st, 2010)Presenter gave us thirty minutes to work on a group task. That was 1 hour ago. Took our group ten mins... Sigh... (2:34pm July 21st, 2010)Conversation on the bridge, waiting for the bats: Ele: where are the bats? Me: well, some are flying, some are still resting. Some are hunting for bugs. Ele: will they fly into us? Am: if the can use echolocation to catch tiny bugs, I'm sure they can use echolocation to avoid hitting a big girl like you. Ele: what if I sound like a mosquito? (makes buzzing sounds) Ethan: (joins Ele, buzzing) (11:13am July 21st, 2010)Conference is dragging a bit... (11:11am July 21st, 2010)No bats tonight. Maybe in my dreams. Night all. (11:00pm July 20th, 2010)On congress bridge in Austin waiting on the bats... (9:43pm July 20th, 2010)Mmmmmm! Friday's on Tuesday! (7:10pm July 20th, 2010)Who is your hero? Why? (2:04pm July 20th, 2010)Shocked (10:39am July 20th, 2010)If you can't identify your needs, they won't get met with any kind of consistency. If those needs aren't getting met consistently, you will most likely experience some form of depression. - Dr. Claudia Black (9:41am July 20th, 2010)Conference day 2: morning keynote is kicked off with Christian rapper Litaroti. Ha! I hope this does a better job waking me up than the hotel coffee. (8:35am July 20th, 2010)In Austin. Ready to start the convention stuff during the day and the family fun by night. (7:13am July 20th, 2010)Had papa's grilled chicken and got to see the chris heard family and moosha and zach! Feeling full of food and fully blessed as I start to Austin. (8:09pm July 19th, 2010)Whew. Half of my marathon trip is done. Now to grab a bite and get in the road to Austin. (7:22pm July 19th, 2010)Ugh I think I have a kidney stone. *whimper* (6:14pm July 19th, 2010)Grande iced chai tea latte, please! (11:11am July 19th, 2010)At IHOP with uncles, niece, sister and mama. Yay for food and fellowship. (9:14am July 19th, 2010)Family dinner: a lesson in modern anthropology. And hilarious, from a certain perspective. (6:15pm July 18th, 2010) Love my family! On the way to the funeral home, stopped by Starbucks. Grandpa takes his straight. Glad we can still smile. (3:46pm July 18th, 2010)"The hardest thing about having a third child is switching from 1-on-1 to a zone defense." -ha! Single parents have it even harder. (12:37am July 18th, 2010)Monsters v. Aliens is a surprisingly entertaining movie. 4 stars on the ERS. (9:38pm July 17th, 2010)Murphy is laughing at me. Took the van to the carwash, where I paid to have the carpet cleaned because the kids have spilled drinks in the back several times recently. 1.5 hours later, car is clean and washed and carpet shampoo'ed. 10 minutes after leaving the carwash, I spilled my coke all over the driver's side floor. I've not spilled a drink in a car for years. Jeff: 0, Murphy: 1 (6:12pm July 17th, 2010)Quote of the day: people may not always believe what you say, buy they will always believe what you do. (8:36am July 17th, 2010)MH is home from camp, safe and sound except for (as near as we can tell) about 40 mosquito bites. (12:41am July 17th, 2010)Ele: Daddy, I don't want you to die. Me: Ok, I'll live forever. Ele: No, but you have to die so you can go to Heaven. Me: That is my plan. Ele: So, you can die, but only if you go to Heaven, not the other place, okay? Me: I'm glad we're on the same page, baby. (9:09pm July 16th, 2010)Feels blessed by good friends. (7:11pm July 16th, 2010)Taking care of business. (11:41am July 16th, 2010)Isn't feeling it this morning. (8:52am July 16th, 2010)R.I.P. James Smalley. Love you, Gold. (9:10pm July 15th, 2010)What.a.day. Exhausted. Srsly. (8:13pm July 15th, 2010)My favorite no-shows: those ones where I get up early to get to the appointment which is scheduled at the client's own house! "oh sorry, forgot it was today... I am still asleep, can you come back later?" grrr (9:15am July 15th, 2010)feels goofy that getting a new appointment book is a reason to be happy. It is weird, but seeing the pristine pages, with no appointments, no scheduling... feels full of promise that I could possibly get back in charge of my schedule... ha! (11:48pm July 14th, 2010)Okay, fun's over. Back on your heads! (10:38pm July 14th, 2010)Redneck Haiku, by Mary Witte: Clifford nearly starves when Pranksters hide his food stamps Under his work boots. (10:34pm July 14th, 2010)Redneck Haiku, by Mary Witte: Marriage proposal Was spurned but still appears on Town's water tower. (10:28pm July 14th, 2010)Redneck Haiku, by Mary Witte: Clyde depressed, drinking. Divorce cost alimony and NASCAR tickets. (10:25pm July 14th, 2010)Redneck Haiku, by Mary Witte: Garbage truck driver Gets confused on Bubba's street. What stays and what goes? (10:22pm July 14th, 2010)Redneck Haiku, by Mary Witte: Drunk judges award First place in science fair to Junior's whisky still. (10:17pm July 14th, 2010)Not counting drive time between locations, I sat at my desk for a total of 5 minutes today. While I generally like not being tied to my desk to do my job, today it means I get to go back to the office for a few hours to catch up. (7:54pm July 14th, 2010)misplaced my keys :( (11:28pm July 13th, 2010)Great night's sleep! Okay, Monday, I am read... wha.....? Oh, it's Tuesday? Darnit! (7:14am July 13th, 2010)MH dropped off at camp. Visited my very ill grandfather, reconnected with extended family and had a road trip with my sister. What's next? Three hours of therapy. Oh, no, not that... see, I'm the therapist... (3:20pm July 12th, 2010)Almost home... (1:45pm July 12th, 2010) Getting on the road... First stop, coffee! (5:30am July 11th, 2010)Road trip tomorrow! Taking MH to Amarillo to attend camp. Along for the ride: Jada Rhodes, my delightful sister. We get to visit my grandfather and multiple Starbucks franchises along the way! Yay roadtrips! (12:03am July 11th, 2010)All done with work! Time for family! (5:14pm July 10th, 2010)Twogether in Texas 8 hour marathon... Begin! (9:02am July 10th, 2010)Commitment is making a choice to give up other choices. (12:55am July 10th, 2010)Revenge! Sweet revenge! That's what happens when you have four amazing sister's...and a wife who knows the password for the phone...! (9:13pm July 9th, 2010)New verb: I had a client who joked about being my stalker... She said ,"I mean I don't want to What-about-bob you...". Hahaha (8:29pm July 9th, 2010)wonders if his required paperwork was a Facebook game, if he would be able to get it finished in a timely manner... (3:50pm July 9th, 2010)Got no-showed today, but we'd scheduled to meet at DQ, so at least I got to have a Blizzard. (10:20pm July 7th, 2010)Ethan and MH have an insulin pump called an Omnipod. The 'pod' has a smooth surface and lately they've wanted to use Sharpies to draw on the pod before affixing it to their sites. Ethan let me draw a dragon on his. I drew Trogdor! I feel cool. :) (10:16pm July 6th, 2010)On July 6th, 1996, Amelia answered that fateful question by telling me, "Adieu". No, wait, I mean she said , "I do"! Happy 14 years, baby. (8:24am July 6th, 2010)Bill & Ted had it right: Be excellent to each other. (12:00am July 6th, 2010)Had a great day off :) Back to the grind tomorrow. (9:50pm July 5th, 2010)It is strangely quiet in the house... Oh yeah, Ele is stating the night with Luz... (9:45pm July 4th, 2010)Baptism today! Another citizen celebrating freedom in Christ! Hallelujah! (9:54am July 4th, 2010)Went to the fireworks show at Clyde Lake. Pretty decent show, considering. Happy Independence Day, America. (11:26pm July 3rd, 2010)Imagines that heaven will be periods of profound worship in the presence of the almighty punctuated by fellowship which includes food similar to what we are eating for dinner tonight. Mesquite smoked steak and fixins... Yum! (6:13pm July 3rd, 2010)Parade, yardwork, errands and now, happy hour at Sonic. Yay slushes! (2:59pm July 3rd, 2010)Discovered "minute to win it" and thinks that these games would make for a fun competition at camp... (10:11pm July 2nd, 2010)Simply doesn't understand why prescriptions for conditions like type 1 diabetes expire. It is not as if the condition is going to improve. No, before you reply, I really do understand that there are tons of good reasons... I just find it inconvenient when it happens to me. (5:51pm July 2nd, 2010)Has Monday off, without having to use PTO. woo hoo! (5:00pm July 2nd, 2010)It is Friday, payday, and a holiday weekend. Why won't my funk go away? (7:41am July 2nd, 2010)Me: "It's that time of the month again..." Co-worker: "What time is that?" Me: "The beginning..." Why is there always too much month left over at the end of the money? (1:49pm July 1st, 2010)is listening to the Word of the Lord from the book of Matthew. (8:11pm June 30th, 2010)A man asked his neighbor if he could borrow a rope. "Sorry," said the neighbor, "I'm using it to tie up some water." "That doesn't make any sense! Rope can't tie up water!" came the reply. The neighbor responded,"Well, when you don't want to do a thing, one excuse is as good as another." (10:33pm June 29th, 2010) Question of the day: How are you inviting me to respond to you with your behavior toward me? In other words: although we are not responsible for how people choose to respond to us, we often invite certain reactions based on OUR OWN way of being toward a person. (3:30pm June 29th, 2010)Monday? Go away. I did you yesterday. Let's move on. (10:56am June 29th, 2010)Is lying in bed, awash in cool, temperature regulated air. Ahhhhh. Yay for A/C! (10:54pm June 28th, 2010)Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever. (11:11pm June 27th, 2010)At Red Robin with the fam. Yum! (12:51pm June 27th, 2010)What a great week. In addition to getting paid to hang out with some great kids, I also got to hang out with my OWN kids. All week long! We had a blast! Yay quality time (and getting paid while doing it!) (11:02pm June 25th, 2010)Had his A game on all week and is going to see the A-Team tonight with Ethan and @Trey Gibson. (5:34pm June 25th, 2010)really wants a plate of "Cheese Fries" from Outback Steakhouse... anyone want to treat me? (3:56pm June 25th, 2010)Civ V? Rock on! And a Civ Facebook app? I'll be looking for it... (2:15am June 25th, 2010)Kabir- I had to seek the Physician because of the pain this world caused me. I could not believe what happened when I got there - I found my Teacher. Before I left, he said, "up for a little homework, yet?" "Okay," I replied. "Well then, try thanking all the people who have caused you pain. They helped you come to me." (10:43pm June 24th, 2010)Kabir- I felt in need of a great pilgrimage, so I sat still for three days and God came to me. (10:39pm June 24th, 2010)Thinks it is interesting that the Google: Droid commercials have to list Lucasfilm LTD as the trademark holder for the word "Droid" for their new phone. (11:41pm June 23rd, 2010)Lie to Me* (10:49pm June 23rd, 2010)Feels frazzled. (12:57pm June 23rd, 2010)Watching Gran Turino. Compelling movie. (11:59pm June 22nd, 2010)Needs a nap before bedtime... (6:05pm June 22nd, 2010)Is buying Super Unleaded for 2.49 at HEB. Nice. (4:56pm June 21st, 2010)Day camp, day 1: Success! (12:26pm June 21st, 2010)Gets to hang out with his kiddos every morning this week! (8:24am June 21st, 2010)BEST camp. T minus 9 hours... (12:38am June 21st, 2010)Wishes fathers everywhere enjoy this day and consider how their role to their children reflects the Father in heaven. (1:05am June 20th, 2010)MH is home! Thanks, Marcia. (9:30pm June 19th, 2010)Adventure is out there! (8:17pm June 19th, 2010)Yardwork Saturday! :) (11:37am June 19th, 2010)Is dating a married woman. That is right, I made a date with Amelia for Saturday! (3:12pm June 18th, 2010) MH comes home tomorrow. (8:18am June 18th, 2010)is on fire today! Much better day than Wednesday! (9:35pm June 17th, 2010)Answer: all over Abilene. Question: Where does jeff have to be this morning? (10:08am June 17th, 2010)I went to the card store to buy a card that expressed how I feel when you're not around. There was an entire section devoted to what I was looking for... the sign above it read: Empty inside. (awwww....) (12:39am June 17th, 2010)puts the final signature on a file. Closed! Done! To his horror and dismay, he turns to his inbox, which has been occupied by a trans-dimensional ever-reproducing pile of demonic paperwork! *sigh * (4:47pm June 16th, 2010)hates... H.A.T.E.S. paperwork. *sigh * (3:56pm June 16th, 2010)Time to get around to servicing a flat tire at Wal-mart: 45-60 minutes. Time spent waiting at General Tire: 15 seconds. (9:05am June 16th, 2010)In all things, God works. (12:33am June 16th, 2010)Walking outside, I find myself at the business end of a stick Ethan has pointed at me. "Surrender or die!" he commands. Playing along, I put my hands in the air and say ,"I give up!". Ethan replies ,"It's only a stick, dad..." (8:13pm June 15th, 2010)Missing MH... (12:22pm June 15th, 2010)Looking at the dark skies this morning, leftovers from the all-night deluge, Ele asks Ethan this morning, "What if there are tornadoes? You know how God makes tornadoes? He puts his finger in the clouds and stirs them up." Ethan: "Yeah, they get all swirled up and then the hot air starts fighting with the cold air and they get all spinny." - LOVE IT! (11:33am June 15th, 2010)Words with friends accepted "snaw" as a word(48 pts!). So I decided to look it up and discovered, to my delight, wikipedia... in Scottish! http://sco.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snaw Great fun to read aloud. (6:43am June 15th, 2010)My baby just woke me up to say good-bye as she and Amelia head to camp. Have a great time and be safe, MH! (sheesh, I'm already worried... Does this get easier?) (6:33am June 15th, 2010)Any other iPhone/iTouch users discovered Carcassonne yet? Send me an invite when you do... jde95f@gmail.com (3:32pm June 14th, 2010)If I claim Christ then Christ also claims me. Where, then, did I get the notion that my time belongs to me; that my money belongs to me; that my life belongs to me... Do they not all belong to the God who ransomed me by the blood of his Son? (11:22am June 13th, 2010)is helping a friend develop a profile on eHarmony! Fun! (9:07pm June 12th, 2010)Another day of shooting people. Using a camera, of course... :) (9:53am June 12th, 2010)made it through another week! Praise the Lord! (5:02pm June 11th, 2010)doesn't understand the thinking behind designing the stall door on a bathroom stall to open INTO the stall. Dumb, dumb, dumb. (1:21pm June 11th, 2010)Given that relationships are complex and, at times, messy... Would you consider yourself to be skilled at being in relaitonship with others? (11:28pm June 9th, 2010)Got stung by a bee! Ouch! (7:23pm June 9th, 2010)Is going swimming! Yay summer! (6:06pm June 9th, 2010)was moderately productive tonight. (9:36pm June 8th, 2010)needs a nap. (12:07pm June 8th, 2010)Night, all! (2:56am June 8th, 2010) is working on the blog entry for his sneaky practical joke. hee hee... (12:58am June 8th, 2010)Is happy, having just found an iPhone app: Carcassone! Rock on! (10:51pm June 7th, 2010)Just for a while, try blaming your good behavior on some one else the way you might blame, say, a bad attitude on a ungrateful friend. Try it and let me know what happens. (6:06pm June 7th, 2010)Mission accomplished! (10:26am June 7th, 2010)The game is afoot! (6:36am June 7th, 2010)is putting his sneaky, mischievious self to bed so he can be sneaky again tomorrow, but also safe and not drowsy... (1:51am June 7th, 2010)Is being sneaky and mischievous... (4:10pm June 6th, 2010)Sunday repast at Harvest Moon. Yum! (12:32pm June 6th, 2010)Everything matters. (11:25am June 6th, 2010)Good night, FB. Sleep well, I'll most likely have to kill you in the morning. (name that movie...) (2:55am June 6th, 2010)got to field test his new camera by helping shoot a wedding today! It was awesome, had lots of fun and shot some great photos. Thanks to Am for letting me spend all day playing with my new toy! (11:50pm June 5th, 2010)Highly amused at Ethan's insistence on buying "how to train your dragon" underwear at the store. Inappropriate innuendo runs rampant in my head. (9:56pm June 3rd, 2010)"One of our dominant, almost unexamined fictions is that we are not responsible for our emotions. We erroneously believe they are caused in us by events outside our control. This dogma (that we are not responsible for our emotions) is at the core of every self-betrayer's self-deception." (What We Are via the Arbinger Institute) (1:45pm June 3rd, 2010)Got his new Olympus E-volt e620 today! (8:17pm June 2nd, 2010)Is watching a storm front roll across town from 11 stories high in the Enterprise building. Pretty cool looking from this viewpoint. (4:21pm June 2nd, 2010)Introducing friends to Big Bang Theory is the bomb! (10:38pm June 1st, 2010)Ready to knock out loads of paperwork. (8:22am June 1st, 2010)Arrived home to a miracle. The house was clean. Not just clean, but organized and orderly, like we didn't even live there! Ha! Thanks, Debi Ray and Sarah Ray! (9:26pm May 31st, 2010)The Emerys are home. (8:42pm May 31st, 2010)Eating and early dinner at Cotton Patch in Wichita Falls. Yum! (5:24pm May 31st, 2010)Is playing Munchkin with Amelia and friends! (10:10pm May 30th, 2010)Went bowling with the Waides, Cokers, Rehemels, and Hugabooms! Fun, fun. (4:59pm May 30th, 2010)Is getting ready to worship the Lord God @ North Garland in Enid, OK. (8:42am May 30th, 2010)Is in Enid! (7:15pm May 29th, 2010)Goin' to look at cameras. :) (10:39am May 29th, 2010) Watched The Princess and the Frog this morning. Great show. (10:34am May 29th, 2010)Grrr. Ethan is a bit sick and having high BG and keytones. (1:10am May 29th, 2010)Hangin' with the Stewarts tonight. (9:54pm May 28th, 2010)Update: MH and Ethan's checkup went well. Made some adjustments to their basal insulin rates on their pumps. Ele was a trooper! They took a few thousand gallons of blood over two hours of the Glucose Tolerance Test and we should get the results in a few weeks. This was *not* to tell us if she is diabetic or not... it is part of research trials to develop predictors of who is likely to develop Type 1. (4:49pm May 28th, 2010)Appts are over... Now for Ted's! (12:12pm May 28th, 2010)On the way to an early morning visit to our Endo in OKC. Keep Ele in your prayers as she will undergo a glucose tolerance test. (6:27am May 28th, 2010)In the car, kids were watching "Hook", I was listening. The part where Peter remembers how to fly by getting his happy thought is playing. I ask the kids, "What was Peter Pan's happy thought?" MH answered, "That he's a daddy!". Me, too, kiddo. You should see my heart soar... (11:04pm May 27th, 2010)Resting my head in the Stewart household. Must sleep. Dr appts early in OKC. Night, all. (11:01pm May 27th, 2010)What did the rain smell like before there was warm asphalt? (9:25pm May 27th, 2010)Now entering Soonerland. (8:53pm May 27th, 2010)Rushed back from Brownwood to meet my 530... Murphy's law says they'll no-show... (5:32pm May 26th, 2010)exhausted... (3:26pm May 26th, 2010)doesn't know how he managed to do it, but when he logged into Pandora, he was shocked to find that he had a "Lil' Wayne" station. *Delete* (12:43am May 26th, 2010)always finding new and exciting ways to procrastinate... (10:56pm May 25th, 2010)Hmmm. Weekend checklist: mow yard, attend recital, laundry, clean & vacuum house, catch a nap, post pics of recital. Now to watch a movie with my hunny and share some popcorn! (9:39pm May 23rd, 2010)just woke up from a two hour nap... On a Sunday afternoon! That hasn't happened around these parts for nigh on five years... (5:19pm May 23rd, 2010)At Chili's having a post-ballet-recital celebration with their "Molten Chocolate Cake" (10:33pm May 22nd, 2010)is looking forward to Ele's ballet recital tonight. Look for pics tomorrow. :) (12:05pm May 22nd, 2010)Had a great day and is in charge of dinner tonight. Woo hoo for Hobo Dinners! (6:59pm May 21st, 2010)had a time warp experience (the good kind, not the Rocky Horror Picture Show kind). Ran into a kid from my youth group 15 years ago.... He's married and a productive member of society. I'm looking forward to having lunch with him soon to catch up. (2:23pm May 19th, 2010)Got to get out of my box... (10:39am May 19th, 2010)Frustration this morning... (10:24am May 19th, 2010)Disaster! MH's brand new iPod nano got dropped in the parking lot and shattered the screen. She just got it for her birthday last Saturday. She feels so bad, but we have a plan... (9:56pm May 18th, 2010)Having a Cajun Cone with my boy= awesome. (8:30pm May 18th, 2010)Went to a CEU presentation on Dual Relationships and Professional Ethics. What we didn't talk about was the Duel relationships that couples have, sometimes in session! (1:49pm May 18th, 2010) Whew! Hey fellow therapists, ever finish a session and think to yourself:"Man, I really earned that last hour..."? (5:39pm May 17th, 2010)Paperwork on a Sunday night... 'cause I'm not motivated enough to do it on a Friday... (12:07am May 17th, 2010)Can score higher than a "D" on DDR. Sigh. (7:28pm May 16th, 2010)... And this is how I choose to live: as if I'm jumping off a cliff, knowing that you'll save me, 'cause you've already saved me... (11:36am May 16th, 2010)My house is full of love! (6:07pm May 14th, 2010)Ready to get all my paperwork closed out... then birthday party! (11:59am May 14th, 2010)Friday is a day for meetings... sigh... (8:53am May 14th, 2010)Is eating yogurt at the police station. Interesting start to my Friday. (7:21am May 14th, 2010)Loves that his best friends (even my best male buddies) end our telephone coversations by saying, "I love you". (11:24pm May 13th, 2010)Less than 24 hours till ravenous hordes of pre teen girls descend on our home to spend the night for MH's birthday. I'm at wal mart, stocking up on supplies... (9:42pm May 13th, 2010)Is about to try KFC's double down. (12:39pm May 13th, 2010)Is having his eyes checked. (9:47am May 13th, 2010)Is getting a week's worth of sodium intake from his sunflower seeds. (3:28pm May 12th, 2010)Theory: There is a significant difference between 'punishment' and 'correction'. However most people tend to think of the two are synonymous. Your thoughts? (8:23pm May 11th, 2010)helping Ethan learn to ride his bike was the highlight of my day. (7:36pm May 11th, 2010)is feeling unproductive. (1:05pm May 11th, 2010)...must go to work... have..to..be productive...(insert primal scream here) (7:59am May 11th, 2010)Does anyone like James Patterson's writing? How did he get so popular? Can he write a chapter that is longer than three pages? (12:46am May 11th, 2010)Is awake. It is a start. (7:15am May 10th, 2010)Read "The Magician's Elephant" by Kate DiCamillo. A seemingly light children's tale but full of profound themes and ideas about life and relationships, duty and forgiveness. Highly recommended. (10:03pm May 9th, 2010)Gave his wife the gift of silence this afternoon... Took the kids out so Am could nap. (4:10pm May 9th, 2010)Is making his famous French Toast for a special couple of ladies. (Am-for mother's day, and MH for her birthday) (7:49am May 9th, 2010)Good Saturday. :) (11:23pm May 8th, 2010)Got to see Iron Man 2 with Clinton Jake Morgan last night. It was a great sequel, good character development, plenty of action, great special effects and the setup for the upcoming Avengers movie. ERS: 3 stars. (1:01pm May 8th, 2010)Watching "The Neverending Story" with the family. Ethan is enthralled. (10:01pm May 7th, 2010) Is having a picnic lunch with Ele in our tree house. We have been visited by a "cap-i-tiller" Ele has dubbed 'James'. (12:29pm May 7th, 2010)It is Friday. It is payday. I have the day off of work. Recipie for greatness, folks. (7:52am May 7th, 2010)My day: 830 meeting, 10 am no showed by client, 11 supervision cancelled, 12 meeting, 1 pm got a .25 cent raise at a job I do very rarely, 2 pm crisis call, 3 pm pick up kids then rush to a 4 pm intake, 5 pm client kid who ended up refusing help, 6pm no show. And I'm missing out on mini golf with my family. Life: 5, Jeff: 2. (6:35pm May 6th, 2010)new blog post: http://jde95f.blogspot.com/2010/05/do-you-see-what-i-see.html Posted in status feed because FB doesn't seem to be importing my blog atm... hmmm... (2:04am May 5th, 2010)has noticed that he feels grumpy recently. Has anyone else noticed this? Serious replies only, pls. (9:13am May 4th, 2010)is mourning the loss of Amelia's Ford Escort, which blew a head gasket yesterday evening. The family asks that in lieu of flowers, memorial gifts be donated to the "We need a new car" fund. Thank you, that is all. (8:45am May 4th, 2010)Darnit if there aren't some things you just shouldn't post online.... even if they are really funny. *sigh* (4:15pm May 2nd, 2010)Reading a Deaver novel. Protagonist seems like a take off from 'Lie to me' (9:32am May 2nd, 2010)once rescued an Amazon village from certain devastation by a voracious nest of flesh eating ants using only a glass of water and a hairbrush. Impressive, eh? (7:57pm May 1st, 2010)Sitting at a par 3 where folders can pay $5 to win 10k if they make a hole in one. Tension is high! (9:24am May 1st, 2010)It is for a good cause... (7:54pm April 30th, 2010)The Arbinger Institute: We can't feel justified in withholding kindness from others unless we find, or invent, some reason why we think they deserve it. (10:20am April 30th, 2010)"We cling to the belief that if we hold a person up, he will get strong. But strength develops when one stands on his own."- Elizabeth Brown. (7:33am April 30th, 2010)"You cannot solve a problem using the same level of thinking that caused it." - A. Einstein. In other words, you must be willing not only to do something differently, you must be willing to think about the situation differently. (11:31pm April 29th, 2010)"No one has the power to define you but you.". Not sure I agree with this one... Perhaps it should be 'No one *should* have the power...' (11:21pm April 29th, 2010)"What you avoid controls you." -Elizabeth Brown (11:07pm April 29th, 2010)got no-showed by the same person twice in one day, at the school and the home. *sigh* Time to implement my policy of "Don't work harder than your client." If they want to come in, they can come to the office when I am available... (5:56pm April 29th, 2010)Oh, Hulu queue, I have neglected you. I'm sorry... it is just that Netflix hussy has moved into my Wii, and I've been spending my night watching Bones, season one. I'll make time for you soon... (9:27am April 29th, 2010)Apparently, you can't go crazy by yourself, you have to be driven there... (7:20pm April 28th, 2010)Had a fantastic weekend, but is not looking forward to long hours of work this week and coming weekend. (9:00am April 26th, 2010)looking at working till after 8pm every night this week except Wednesday. Bleh... (11:39pm April 25th, 2010)is content. (12:57am April 25th, 2010)Yay! Papa is grilling for dinner! (5:48pm April 24th, 2010)tired. tru dat. Night. (12:08am April 24th, 2010)Why doesn't an flippin' expensive program like Final Cut PRO *NOT* recognize mpeg2 format? Who fell asleep the day they made sure they were compatible with common formats?!? (11:31pm April 23rd, 2010) Just enjoyed a fireworks show from his back yard. Apparently there was an event at HSU. Fantastic show. Props to the planners. (9:27pm April 23rd, 2010)First Friday in a while that I haven't been already living in the Monday to come.... allowing myself to enjoy being home... Am's homemade manicotti for dinner, some housecleaning, kids want to stay up late watching a movie. Thank you, Lord, for a relaxing Friday. (8:07pm April 23rd, 2010)Looking through the mail, I found irony in the name of the Student Loan Repayment program: Checkmate II: Make your student loan payment automatically.... That's right, the program to allow you to make student loan payments is called "Checkmate". Game over? (6:42pm April 23rd, 2010)headed to ACS to watch the play!!! (11:52am April 23rd, 2010)Had a great morning at ACS taking pics and experiencing the singing and presentations. Looking forward to seeing Ethan star as "Jack" in the 1st grade performance of 'Jack and the Beanstalk' (10:51am April 23rd, 2010)Bluebonnet Plague! Check out my photos.... (7:13am April 23rd, 2010)is working on Bluebonnet Pictures.... (8:48pm April 22nd, 2010)Took family Bluebonnet pictures this afternoon. Hope I find some time to post some of them soon... (2:13am April 22nd, 2010)watched several episodes of season 1 of "Bones" on my Wii tonight, via Netflix. I was moderately impressed with the setup... (11:42pm April 20th, 2010)After trying to clean cooked on grease from the bottom of a pan, I'm wondering why they can't coat the OUTSIDE of the pan with the same high-temperature non-stick coating.... (11:32pm April 19th, 2010)Came home to a dinner of seasoned chicken with spinach and rice, tzatziki, feta cheese, fresh bread and Greek salad. Yay Amelia! (8:59pm April 19th, 2010)Thinking of OKC 15 years ago... (10:53am April 19th, 2010)Is enjoying Netflix online and waiting for his disc to stream video to his Nintendo Wii.... (12:52am April 19th, 2010)This morning, Am said ,"The tear in the bottom of the screen door is now officially large enough to be a cat door." Yipee! (9:47am April 18th, 2010)...and then there was the lawyer who named his child Mea Culpa.... (12:24am April 18th, 2010)Had a fantastic day because I was with my kids all day: road trip, barbecue, games, horses, Dr Pepper museum and lots of picture taking! (6:29pm April 17th, 2010)To change the way you feel about a person, you must first change the way you see that individual. (1:09am April 17th, 2010)Amelia is reading "Little House on the Prairie" to the kids. Pa is building the cabin and he dropped a log on Ma's foot. Ethan and Ele both sat up in concern for her wellbeing until Am finshed the page, revealing only a sprain. I love family reading time. (9:12pm April 15th, 2010)Relationship management flows from empathy about other's emotions, which flows from management of your own emotions, which flows from awareness of your own emotions and how they cause you to behave. (5:29pm April 15th, 2010)God, bless my children today. Help them to know that they are loved, not just by me, but by you. (8:19am April 15th, 2010)When you see me in the morning I won't be the person you knew yesterday. Who will I be? I don't know, but I'm on my way... (12:13am April 15th, 2010)Me, to a mom "quit responding to what he's saying and respond to how he is feeling. See if that makes a difference..." (12:36pm April 14th, 2010)Bluebonnets somehow make the weekly drive to Brownwood better. (9:33am April 14th, 2010)Found on the web: "note to self: flammable and inflammable mean the same thing". Haha. Wonder what prompted that revelation? (7:54pm April 13th, 2010)is seriously considering blocking/hiding all Zoo World notifications. I love my friends, but find the constant updates on my feed very distracting. (11:00am April 13th, 2010) My friends are hurting, Lord. It doesn't affect me, but I hurt for my friends. Be the God of all comfort that you have promised to be and allow me to comfort them with comfort I have recieved from you. (11:10pm April 12th, 2010)Ready for the end of the day, but not able to make it happen for a few more hours. Think I'll take a 5 minute break to talk with my bro, Jesus. (4:11pm April 12th, 2010)House was wrong, sometimes it IS Lupus, just not on his show. (4:07pm April 12th, 2010)wonders what settings have changed on FB that keep him from being able to post new, original comments on some people's walls. I can comment on other people's comments, but not post new wall comments. Odd... (9:24am April 12th, 2010)Good morning, Monday. I know we've had issues in the past, but I'm willing to overlook them and try to work WITH you today. Let's see what we can accomplish... (8:30am April 12th, 2010)At the zoo, in the reptile house. Ethan is practicing his parseltongue with a pit viper. (1:23pm April 10th, 2010)Picnic, zoo, photo ops, spending the day with my family = awesome. (10:08am April 10th, 2010)protests Tom Papa's assertion that the panelists on "The Marriage Ref" are 'experts'. They are panelists or perhaps entertainers... but marriage experts? Let me see their credentials... (1:30am April 10th, 2010)Watching "The Marriage Ref" on Hulu.com. Looking for what not to do in therapy sessions... (10:31pm April 9th, 2010)was just given a bandana by Ethan. I put it on my head, gangsta style and was promptly told, "Dad! That is *not* how a cowboy wears a bandana!" (9:47pm April 9th, 2010)is using active voice in his case notes. Took some correction and changing sentences so they did not end in prepositions, but case note grammar is up to par. Thanks, Mrs. Hamilton. (9:40am April 9th, 2010)is using active voice in his case notes. Took some correction and changing sentences so they did not end in prepositions, but case note grammar is up to par. Thanks, Mrs. Hamilton. (9:23am April 9th, 2010)It is impossible to truly love another without first loving oneself. (8:46am April 9th, 2010)It is impossible to dehumanize another without dehumanizing oneself. (10:42pm April 8th, 2010)So much to get done today and so little Thursday to do it in... (10:49am April 8th, 2010)is eating Fried Rice and Chicken with chopsticks and watching Hulu... nice. (9:51pm April 7th, 2010)Can you understand the difference in these two phrases: "I can't do that, my dad would kill me!" vs. "I can't do that, it would kill my dad..." (5:16pm April 6th, 2010)When we are obsessed with ourselves, we have little sensitivity for other people; we're far too insecure to love freely. So other people respond to us in ways that confirm our fears and anxieties. - The way we are (Arbinger Institute) (12:53pm April 6th, 2010)Is on his way to do a presentation on child abuse prevention to 3rd grade. (9:56am April 6th, 2010)On a scale of 1 to Crazy, I'm penguin! Happy Monday, everyone. (9:30am April 5th, 2010)Modern Family: Romance between Phil and his Apple iPad. Me gusto mucho. Made me laugh. (10:44pm April 4th, 2010)Working on LTC pics. Stay Tuned. (3:53pm April 4th, 2010)1) happy Easter 2)no ltc practice today - there's a nap for that 3) how to train your dragon... I am going looking for tips on what to do with my kids... (12:20pm April 4th, 2010)I just Topeka'd myself! (1:36pm April 1st, 2010)has accepted a job as a Youth Minister for Minter Lane! (7:46am April 1st, 2010) If we accept that we can't *make* anyone behave a certain way toward us, how do we invite people to treat us the way we want to be treated? (10:47pm March 31st, 2010)is so proud of all of the Minter Lane Kids and adults who are involved in LTC and made tonight's LTC showcase a success! (8:49pm March 31st, 2010)Irony: up late doing paperwork and I turn on Pandora.com and Barenaked Ladies' "Who needs sleep" comes on. (12:20am March 31st, 2010)Amelia, sitting in her recliner, picks up a Peep (marshmallow goodness, folks), stares at it for a moment, then bites off its head. "Aaaaaahhhhhh!", she cries, imitating Peepish terror. Then, in a mysterious voice she intones, "It is murder most foul (fowl)." and proceeds to laugh uncontrollably. And y'all wonder where our kids get it.... (10:01pm March 30th, 2010)Several ways of conveying the same idea: 1) In general, people respond more to your Way of Being than to how you do things. 2)You can get away with a lot if you have the right relationship. 3) I don't care what you know until I know that you care. 4) Love covers a multitude of sins. (10:02pm March 29th, 2010)Almost caught up with my Hulu queue. (12:51am March 27th, 2010)Ethan's ingenious way of streamlining the morning routine: He sleeps in his morning clothes so when he gets out of bed, he is already dressed! One day when he is older, I'll talk to him about wrinkles.... lol. (7:26am March 26th, 2010)Modern Family, Phil: "Don't fight it, hon. 'Mother' is part of the word. You never hear of someone being sfathered to death." (10:52pm March 25th, 2010)9 year old kid in one of my sessions today, upon inspecting my facial hair, points to the area under his lip and asks, "Do you think I'm growing any puberty right here?" I managed to hold it together and not laugh at him, which is better than his parents did. (5:50pm March 25th, 2010)unconsciously took a 'not knowing' stance in a conversation with his wife today. Good therapeutic technique, but it turns out that "I'm not sure what that means. What does that look like for you?" is a trigger phrase for Amelia. She let me know that she doesn't like it. heh. (1:24pm March 25th, 2010)Ethan had difficulty today in class. Amelia called me and we agreed to have a sit-down talk with him before bed. Amelia complains that I therapize too much with the kids and need to be more "parental". So, at one point in my ... ahem... discipline intervention, Ethan says, "Dad, you've talked so much tonight that MY jaw hurts." Amelia shook with silent mirth in the background. (9:51pm March 24th, 2010)Stuck in brownwood for a bit longer. Sigh. (5:41pm March 24th, 2010)ready for bed.... ZZZzzzzzz...... (12:44am March 24th, 2010)is getting his Chuck on, on Hulu. I'm addicted. (10:04pm March 23rd, 2010)The Marriage Ref: Madonna, "Your misogyny knows no bounds." Ha! (11:10pm March 22nd, 2010)is loved abundantly more than he deserves. (7:53pm March 22nd, 2010)Day off = productive? Remains to be seen. (2:23pm March 22nd, 2010)Got up this morning and made French Toast for the fam for breakfast. Yum! (10:38am March 22nd, 2010)Grrr.... someone stole a box of T-shirts from my car overnight. Called APD and filed a report, but not much can be done unless the turn up. Lock your cars if you leave them outside overnight. Nefarious doings happen overnight on the Hill. (4:01pm March 20th, 2010)*crickets chirp* Oh, Office you are so quiet today. Wait... I can hear hulu.com in the background while I type. I'm saved! (10:11am March 19th, 2010)Went 10 for 16 on the games last night, but since I never follow sports, is that bad or good? Does anyone know? Does anyone care? (9:50am March 19th, 2010)Hello, quiet office. Will you help me be productive today? (9:43am March 19th, 2010)Just got a sweet call from his little sister. Praise God for good relationships with family. I love my sisters! (2:45pm March 18th, 2010)80% of the show "Lost" is the characters wandering around in the jungle from place to place. (7:56pm March 17th, 2010)I stopped returning "pokes" on FB about a year ago. How is everyone else doing with this feature? (2:21am March 17th, 2010) I dislike labels, except on soup cans. (1:54am March 17th, 2010)Oreos + Milk at 12:11am = Win for taste buds and gratification. Also = how to lose a weight loss bet with one's sister... (12:12am March 17th, 2010)At the Dr. today, Ethan was told that another T1 boy told the Dr. that he doesn't call it "Di"abetes, he calls it, "Live-abetes". Ethan said "Oh, he meant like, DIE! (feigned stabbing himself in the heart and fell to the floor" The Doctor said, "Um, yeah." as related by Amelia. Oh, Ethan has Strep. *sigh* (11:08pm March 16th, 2010)I told a friend that I wanted to see "Alice in Wonderland" with Amelia. The look I got back told me that I'd miscommunicated. What my friend heard me say was, "I'd like to get some Cialis in Wonderland with Amelia" My comment went from a date with my wife to problems with ED and or some illicit drugs in 5 seconds... (7:02pm March 16th, 2010)Dear Tuesday, thanks for not being so lousy, but did you have to be so busy that I couldn't get any paperwork done? (6:59pm March 16th, 2010)Finds some things to be positively prosaic! (2:17pm March 16th, 2010)Dear Monday, I have to admit you disappointed me. Didn't Sunday tell you what a great day we had? Why did you have to go get gloomy and rainy? It seems that your mood has rubbed off on Tuesday as well. Let's get the act together and see if the rest of the week could be happier, k? (10:28am March 16th, 2010)me+hulu.com = catching up on new episodes, but not sleeping. (10:38pm March 13th, 2010)is on the road to San Antonio... (5:58pm March 10th, 2010)TAMFT is in San Antonio this week. Have fun learning about the Neuroscience of relationships. Doesn't that just get you all hot and bothered? Ha! I must be a therapy geek cause I'm really looking forward to it. (5:32pm March 9th, 2010)Enjoy the sunshine, Abilenians! (10:10am March 9th, 2010)Conferences, meetings and seminars, Oh, My! Busy week ahead... (10:30am March 8th, 2010)... and the award goes to... Jeff Emery! (cheers and applause) Jeff, "Thank you, everyone. This award is the culmination of a lifelong dream. People who deserve to share in this honor are too numerous to mention and I'm sure I'll miss some, but here goes....(mic cuts out because his 15 seconds of talk time are up and the show cuts to commercial). (11:13pm March 7th, 2010)Ready to settle in for the night... welrusten, FB. (10:11pm March 6th, 2010)Paperwork on Saturday is blech, but going to the park with the fam is Woot! (3:44pm March 6th, 2010)Just watched "The Marriage Ref" on Hulu(dot)com and actually enjoyed it. MH had a lot of questions about what they were fighting about and actually had some good suggestions about how to resolve their arguments that were right on point! Way to go, MH. (10:39pm March 5th, 2010)Do I want to be like Christ or do I really want Jesus to be a bit more like me? (8:41pm March 3rd, 2010)EOM stuff is tedious, but necessary to keep bloodthirsty bureaucrats at bay. (3:49pm March 1st, 2010)It is SNOWING again in Abilene. From the 11th floor of the Enterprise building, it is very pretty. (2:25pm March 1st, 2010)Listening to: Wonderful by Everclear. (1:43pm March 1st, 2010)Ran late, missed breakfast, fussed at the kids for being slow, arrived 5 minutes late for my 8am, client called at 8:13 to cancel and apologize for not showing up. Hi, Monday. You showed up rainy and set a tone for the day. (8:34am March 1st, 2010)is exhausted. Did I do too much this weekend... or did I just stay up too late last night watching TV and goofing off? Probably both. (6:25pm February 28th, 2010)LTC stuff tomorrow... hope everyone has been working on their stuff.... (11:26pm February 27th, 2010)Had a fantastic day. Got to go roller skating with the whole family and some friends. Shopped for groceries (and saved $17 with coupons and had rotisserie chicken (it was delicious). Kids are taking baths... about to make brownies... good day. :) (8:26pm February 27th, 2010)Skies are blue, roads are clear... guess I have to make the trip to Brownwood. Ah, work travel. (9:58am February 24th, 2010) Paperwork: a necessary evil. (8:29pm February 22nd, 2010)There's a brand new day coming... too soon. Time to sleep. (10:59pm February 18th, 2010)Love is being willing to value the other person and also being unwilling to devalue the other-Everett Worthington. (11:11pm February 13th, 2010)Drowning in debt and credit card usury, I cry out. The Lord reminds me through the Spirit that I am rich beyond measure, in ways that the world doesn't value. My accountant reminds me to check for EITC when I file. (12:20am February 13th, 2010)Got paid today, both of us, and we're still behind. *sigh* My Friend, Dave Rigsby posted that as of today, he is out of credit card debt. *jealous*, but 'grats, Rigs. (10:52am February 12th, 2010)Catching up on Lost... (11:02pm February 10th, 2010)Ele: Uh-uh! That isn't fair! Ethan: Yes it is! Ele: It doesn't work that way! Ethan: Yes, it does. God beats everything. Ele: Nuh-uh! Ethan: Yes. Now do it again. Ele: 1-2-3... Ethan: Rock, Paper..... GOD! I win. (9:18pm February 9th, 2010)Woo hoo... making up for my lack of blogging in the past few months with back to back posts! http://jde95f.blogspot.com OR just wait for FB to import it. (2:00am February 8th, 2010)Psych: Gus to Shawn: You have never read the Bible, have you? Shawn: Yes! (Ticks off items with his fingers) Genesis, Exorcist, Leviathan... Do...the right thing... HA! Great writing. (11:19pm February 7th, 2010)Getting ready for a 7:30 meeting. Who planned this? How did I agree to it? Ugh. (7:13am February 5th, 2010)There are lots of Cons of having the kids have a low blood sugar in the middle of the night, but one Pro is that while we're waiting to check again, I get some great cuddles from my babies... (10:52pm February 4th, 2010)Thinks of the irony of working with adolescents, helping them develop emotional skills that many adults seem to lack; impulse control, not taking on someone else's anxiety, anger management... (11:16pm February 3rd, 2010)Have you heard the news? Sometime this spring, Netflix will start service to allow streaming services to the Nintendo Wii. It isn't HD yet, though. Who wants to bet that Nintendo offers a new console that is HD compliant... Behind the curve when it comes to PS3 and Xbox. (5:30pm February 1st, 2010)Have you ever been irrationally angry at your parents for not fixing something, then as you grew, you came to understand that it was out of their power to fix? (9:14pm January 30th, 2010)If I could convey in words, how delicious it smells in my kitchen right now, you'd invite yourself over for dinner... (7:11pm January 30th, 2010)iPod app reports: 2.62 miles traveled in 38:05 minutes, a 14.32 minute mile; 369 calories burned. Now I need to replenish the calories I burned... where are my M&Ms? (10:32pm January 26th, 2010)Headed out for my walk/jog/run. Will post results upon return. How did people exercise without iPods? /boggle. (9:49pm January 26th, 2010)Workin' late on paperwork. Case notes are easier, but no less time consuming. Bleh. (8:51pm January 26th, 2010)Chillaxin' with my Hulu queue... (9:24pm January 25th, 2010)drowning in busy work. bleh. (9:47am January 25th, 2010)Great guys' night. SW: ROTJ, Popcorn, Brownies, Super Mario Wii and snuggles. Awesome. (12:21am January 23rd, 2010)Okay, I'm back. Sancho reports: 2.66 miles traveled; in 38 minutes (Walking, jogging); burned 380 calories. I should really weigh myself to establish my starting weight. (12:22am January 22nd, 2010)is headed out for another jog... if I keep this up, I might not feel so bad about the M&Ms I ate by the handful.. (11:28pm January 21st, 2010)Loves being in his own house! Blessing from Heaven. (2:22pm January 21st, 2010)"Do I look like a bus? 'Cause I just took you to school!" -Ha! Better off Ted cracks me up. (2:16pm January 21st, 2010) is feeling on top of the world. Lookout paperwork, here I come. (let's hope my afternoon is productive) (1:56pm January 21st, 2010)is restoring his calm by watching mindless media drivel on Hulu.com (9:59pm January 19th, 2010)iPod pedometer reports: 39:04 minutes spent in exercise (walk, jog). Distance: 2.63 miles and a measly 361 calories burned. (1:19am January 19th, 2010)Is going for a jog. (12:31am January 19th, 2010)We had a full house for dinner tonight! I love having a full house: friends, food, fun. Great combo. Thanks for making my night: Matt, Shy, Heather, Matt, Clinton, Timothy. Yay for Amelia and her amazing Mama Mia soup! (11:04pm January 18th, 2010)Trust is not a commodity that you can buy today and have on hand tomorrow. It is something that grows, day by day, with predictability and stability. (9:25pm January 14th, 2010)My brain is mush because of that evil alien plot: Hulu.com. Sigh. Bedtime. (1:18am January 13th, 2010)Ha! Episode 2 of the Bachelor, quote of the show: Rozalyn, on being confronted with news that she is beign kicked off the show for being inapporpriate with a staff member of teh show, "I don't think that my personal life is anybody's business." HELLO! Why are you on teh show? (12:50am January 13th, 2010)I'm now watching a new comedy: The Bachelor. Has anyone else seen it? The premise is that some guy is really, truly, honestly thinking he's going to find true love by vetting 25 shallow women on national TV. Very funny stuff! (11:12pm January 12th, 2010)Finished catching up on Chuck... moving on to Heroes... (10:22pm January 12th, 2010)is catching up on his Chuck. (9:26pm January 12th, 2010)"I hid under your porch because I love you. Can I stay?" - Dug (11:41pm January 11th, 2010)fell asleep cuddling with his son, Ethan last night at 9:30pm. Woke up (late) this morning at 7:20am. Can't believe I slept so long, but MAN! I feel good. (9:15am January 8th, 2010)Better off Ted makes me laugh. hulu.com (12:02am January 7th, 2010)Was pleased in a self-serving kind of way to note that 16 of my FB friends are currently using a Profile Picture that I shot. :) (12:29am January 6th, 2010)Good visit with the Hudsons, now to invite someone else to come visit so we have an excuse to clean house again. (10:34am January 5th, 2010)Yay! Jay is almost here! (4:28pm January 4th, 2010)is scheduling a busy week meeting with clients :)! Yay for jobs. (10:31am January 4th, 2010)has a headache. The first of the new year, the new decade! I'm probably making too much of it, though. (9:37pm January 1st, 2010)